You can understand that after the biggest announcement of our lives blogging careers yesterday and any thoughts about you and your new janky (heh) haircut and weird outfit flew out the window in place of a lot of squeeing and dopey smiles. Thank god this coversation between some LTR/LTT regulars took place BEFORE that!
Breaking down Rob’s new look…
Brookelockart: I think Rob will look cute with his short haircut, but WHAT IS HE WEARING?!? Also, what is up with the smallest back pack known to man? This is his answer to the man bag? His little black back pack? (cue music). THE PANTS!! <—
Moon: since i live on the west coast (west coast wins! HA!) and was UP when these gems came out last night, i had night mares about it. i think the outfit is the most troublesome. we’ve never seen this courier scum/too short cargo pants outfit combo. the hair’s not really a deal to me since it grows back but im just thinking about his upcoming tv appearances (I’m at Ellen today!)… we get crazy Jacob Janokski/80s teen movie bully hair. It’ll be like
Brookelockart: Come on, these are like modern day hammer pants. There’s enough room up top for another person, but then they get skinny jean like at the bottom. If he didn’t have his face, people would think he was some slow kid by the way he dresses. please.
EastFriend: Because I can deal with the Hammer-time pants. (“We got to pray just to make it today!”) I can deal with his hair ’cause I’ve never cared about his hair–I mean, I love the dude & his locks, but his hair doesn’t make or break him, ya know? (That shit better get dyed red, though. RED. Stick to the book, dammit.) But…blue? And not even navy. Royal blue. NO.
Brookelockart: with pants and dark sneakers, I believe darker socks look better. BUT THOSE SOCKS. Wonder where he stole them from?
EastFriend: Salvation Army. Has to be. You know he shops there. Bet there’s even Rob-at-Goodwill/Sal Army fanfic out there. “He pushed her against the Bob Ross painting, breaking the seashell lamp behind it…”
UC: Then they fell together with a passionate moan on top of the army-issued camo tent that hadn’t seen that much action since the days of ‘Nam…
EastFriend: There are so many other worthy components to a Salvation Army hook-up…the stained Barcalounger…Alvin & the Chipmunks glassware, circa 1982…mauve silk lillies, in a matching mauve enamel vase…and a faded, hole-filled Michigan State t-shirt. OMG, that would be hot. Someone–go find him an old Michigan St. t-shirt.
UC: someone is asking on twitter where we think the neon blue socks came from. I mean obviously we think either the Salvo OR that homeless man who sleeps outside of Amoeba records, but … where else?
EastFriend: The socks came from Salvo, OR he stole them from Kristen’s brother, who obviously got them from Salvo…one night while really high.
UC: someone on twitter said this: “I worry that those were in the 3-for-$1 bin and he has other colors to spring on us.” this is a huge concern of mine as well
EastFriend: Dude. I hope he got a shitload o’ socks. Praying for some yellow. OR, even better…some big 80’s tube socks, with red and navy stripes on top.
Moon: i like a man in interesting socks. Hello, Chris Weitz loved a good colorful sock! And anything he does is obviously God-breathed. i really dont care for white gym socks. at all. yuck city.
Brookelockart: Should we really be thinking what photo shoot or movie set did he steal these from? OR is he stealing socks from Kristen? (my ex used to steal my socks all the time).
CalliopeBlabs: i cannot begin to tell you have disturbed i am by Rob’s outfit. Seriously. it scares me. it’s like he went from shopping at the Salvo to straight up dumpster diving to find his clothes. i hope that one day he has the most materialistic child in the world who refuses to wear anything other than the finest italian fabrics and asian silks to punish him for torturing his fans this way. amen. bc that was definitely a prayer.
Brookelockart: can we go back to the little black back pack? What is the point of such back pack if it doesn’t fit your stuff?? like scripts? who bought that for him? is it a child size? Is this what he picked up at the Salvation Army?
UC: and Brookie you’re right- he stole them from Kristen, who stole them from her bro Cameron, who stole them from the LAST foster family he lived with, who probably got them from Salvo.. it’s cyclical y’all i love saying y’all
MOON: wtf is up with the backpack? that and this whole outfit makes him look like a german tourist(no offense German readers!) at disneyland. i half expect little packets of fruit snacks, fast passes and english/german dictionary to fall out. get it together man!
UC: Do we think it’s a beer backpack? Is he a weirdo who collects teeny tiny things? like miniature sets of his movies- like a serial killer? Complete with a minutiae Kristen & Miniature Rob, getting it on a miniature bear skin rug?
CalliopeBlabs: http://www.miniatures.org/newsite/index.php DEFINITELY
EastFriend: OMS–don’t be saying miniature in reference to Rob. it makes me thing of small things
BrookeLockart: you know who else is miniature? David Slade. Are they really buddies and all the rumors were vicious lies? I mean, he lent him is backpack. So nice.
CalliopeBlabs: THE TWIFECTA…. PROMOTING ECLIPSE ONE SEARS CATALOG AT A TIME —>
You’re worrying us again Rob, the new shirts and pants, the fact that they’re ill fitting and oddly reminiscent of early 90’s pop stars or tourists at a popular amusement park is alarming. Just when we thought we got you back, you do and buy a new shirt and pair of pants. And now you’re shilling for Sears? We’re so confused!
Come back to us soon old, fun Rob
PS See you tomorrow at Ellen! Yup, I’ll be there this time! In the audience! Follow us on Twitter for updates before and after the taping!
So what in the world is up with those socks, would you call it a cerulean or electric blue? And what on god’s green earth is he wearing?
DON’T FORGET: The contest to celebrate the grand opening of the LTR/LTT store! Make sure you participate cause you could win BIG! Your entries are due this Thursday! Get to it!