Posted by: themoonisdown | October 20, 2009

If Rob wasn’t famous – his other jobs

Dear Rob,

What if you weren’t “Robert Pattinson” aka Edward Cullen? What if you weren’t the new Johnny Depp, or that guy who does “the Tuck” while playing Salvador Dali? Seriously, what would you do if you weren’t an actor? It’s hard to image (actually not at all, I have a very active imagination) but there’s some of the ideas I’ve come up with…

Inspired by HeyyyyBrother who sent this first image to us, we just had to know what other jobs you might have had

Used Car Salesmen at Cars-B-Sold in Fort Lauderdale – Let him rev your engine!


Rug Specialist as Sofa King in New Jersey – He’s Sofa King good at his job!

Lounge Singer at Blue Moon Piano Bar in Shaboygan, WI  – Let him tickle your ivories!

Follow the cut to see the rest of Rob’s jobs

New Leader of the TBirds! – Move over Danny Zucko, there’s a new greaser in town!

(very dressed up) Park Ranger / Tour Guide at Yellow Stone National Park – He can’t wait to show you Ol’ Faithful (that’s what she said!)

Seasonal Sales Associate at Anthropologie – He loves to show you exactly how comfortable their over priced couches are! Why don’t you jump on here with him and give it a whirl! He’ll have this rung up and delivered just in time for Chrismukkah!

Musical Evangelists in Japan – Just them a couple mics, some suits from the Men’s Warehouse and they will be saving souls in NO time. KStew lost a bet and got dragged along. She’s NOT into singing solo’s. Ever.

So Rob I think you should probably stay an actor or at least a Rug Specialist because these others aren’t really your bag, but I’d like to see you try in your weeks off!


What jobs did I miss? What else could Rob do if he wasn’t an actor?

Good times to be had in The Forum
Enjoy LTT today and see who won the CafePress Tshirt!

Guess what I just opened? Yup, I tore into my new Bite Me notepad from Lobotome!! And seriously, it’s awesome. Like UC said over at LTT we get a lot of emails pitching us stuff and when I saw this one I knew I had to email Lobotome back and tell them that we loved the product! And they were super sweet and sent us back a couple pads to try out along with samples of their other to-do lists.

On my list?

-Investigate tshirt manufactuers/silk screeners (um, yup this means we’re trying to get LTT/LTR shirts made!)
-Design Tshirts
– Order more Lobotome lists for Xmas stocking stuffers
– Do Rob

And then I just spent the rest of the time and free space doodling “Mrs. Robert Pattinson” “Mrs. RPattz” “Ms. Needs a Life!”

So go buy some notepads ay LobotoME! and share your obsession in a classy AND useful way!


  1. LTT/LTR t-shirts! I would wear one proudly! Please include slogans such as “My T-Shirt gives me a Cullen Smile,” “That’s what she said” and a special one for boys that says “Unicorn.” You know you want to!

    • Haha! I want mine to say “That’s NORMAL” Do you think Moon and UC will take requests?

      • ‘That’s NORMAL’ should be on ALL the t-shirts!

        • It would be the secret sign, to let other LTR/LTTers know that you’re one of them. When you’re at any Twi/Rob-relate event you’ll be able to find the other LTT/LTR gals by their “That’s NORMAL” T’s. Excellent.

          Can you get them made up in time for New Moon? I’d love to be able to pick out the NORMAL people in the theater.

          • So true dazzled!!!! It would be a great way to find other “normal” peeps out there! It would be much easier than carrying around a life sized cardboard cutout of the Robward….and I think I would get much less awkward stares from strangers.

          • haha.. good idea! our secret sign!

        • Do you think it would be acceptable to have “I wanna bang Rob” written in small font underneath “That’s NORMAL”?? Or would that be too much? It’s important to keep it classy. 🙂

          • maybe on the label? You’d know it was there but no one else would. It’s kinda private.

          • Ooh…the tag idea is a great idea! Good thinkin’ Dazzled….Good thinkin’. 🙂

          • How about “robbanger” written in small font on the sleeve, you know, like it was a logo? Not too obvioius, not too classy, but, getting your needs out there, so to speak? (Wouldn’t want Rob to miss the point if we ever run into him, right?)

          • Hmm…it can kind of be like the “livestrong” logo on arm bands…I think it should be on some. I like to have choices 🙂 Plus, it will also give me a better chance at “blending in” with all of the real normal people. Imjustsayin 😀

        • I love it! I’d so buy one.

      • yes!!! seriously…. request.. and you know “that’s normal” is on the list!
        That’s Normal!

        • Brilliant!! I would ❤ an LTT shirt!!!! Other ideas…
          Got Jorts
          Oregano Who?
          Unicorns Welcome

        • haha ive got one that says save a volvo ride a vampire! and there’s a pic of a car on the bottom left of the shirt 😀

    • I vote for making special tees for those of us who may not love the Twilight saga, but have read the books, want Rob as a lover, and obsesses over all things Twi as much as the fans.

      I’ll admit it: I don’t like Twilight, but I’m on here daily, I dream of meeting Rob, and I spend too much time thinking of Twi-related things. Is that normal? For once, I don’t think it is… *averts eyes*

    • Awesome! Also….
      “Dumpster Diving Since 2008”
      “How To Make a Kitty Meeeoow”

  2. Suddenly……. I feel compelled to purchase a volvo, rugs and to be “saved” by Musical Evangelists.

    If I purchase said couch does it come with Rob?

    It would be hard to explain to the SO but since hes taken to calling me “cougar” lately. Im sure he would totes understand.

    • hahahahahaahahahah! Word!

  3. amazing pun-based jokes mooniepie

    “He’s Sofa King good at his job”
    thats just brilliant!

    • I remember the days when everything was “Sofa King” something. Love it!

  4. I think hobo Rob would simply be unemployed, and possibly homeless.

    And intellectual book-carrying Rob might give readings at public libraries that no one comes to. At least not to listen to the reading.

    LTT t-shirts, yah! Please make sure your shirts ship to Europe! And make one with ‘That’s normal!’ (Although that one’s obvious, right?) Oooh, and one that says ‘Respect Buttcrack Santa’. But that one’s obvious too. Can’t wait!

    • PS: “What can I do to get you in a new volvo today?”
      “Just get in that car, Rob… and don’t come out till I say so.”

    • I hope they indeed ship to Europe!!!!!

      • Oh they do! I had to order when I saw them on LTT and I´m eagerly waiting for them to arrive. The shipping was more expensive than the note pad so i bought several, I justified it with – they are great Christmas gifts for me, myself and I. And my friend Malin…

      • we’ll make sure they ship to Europe! 1/2 of our readers are outside of the US!

    • “And intellectual book-carrying Rob might give readings at public libraries that no one comes to. At least not to listen to the reading.”

      Thank you for the mental image on that one. 😀

      I would be all over that!

      • I think I would possible love Rob even more if he did readings at public libraries. Sigh…

        • possiblY, that is

        • TOTALLY! I would go to his readings simply to fantasize about the man with the hot, British voice. Oh, and if he reads masterpieces like Camus’ Stranger, I’d be more smitten!

    • SO GREAT! Unemployed and homeless… this pint I fell off my chair…LOL

  5. Leader of the TBirds!!!!

    I can see him in the 50s and 60s s one of the Mad Men or a Marlboro Man.
    Man, the gut can make even smoking sexy!

    • The Guy!

      • no no, the gut is funnier..

        • Oh my, I just scrolled through the comments, saw your avatar, and my first thought was “OMG TomStu is commenting!”…it took 1 second to realize it’s just an avatar…I sometimes have this with Rob avatars I see for the first time as well.
          I really need that “that’s normal” T-shirt, it will keep me from seeking professional help.

    • Dude. I’ve considered smoking because of Rob! Stupid, sexy smoker. *drools*

  6. I will only buy ” fake lesbian since 2008″ LTT/TTR t-shirt.

    Voloward looks hot btw!

    The last photo I tought it was someting about weddingsingers.
    Love the post as always.

    • I would wear that!!! LOL

  7. Rob would be a really hott mechanic. Not sure that he would know anything but that is beside the point.

    He is already filthy looking. Just imagine him holding a wrench.

    And I will never let go of the dream that Rob will one day be my library assistant.

    • In the jumpsuit with a greasy rag hanging out of his front pocket? The kind of jump suit that just has the one long zipper down the front? … I think I need a moment alone..

      • YES! You have it! 😀

        • mmmm….remember Bruce Springsteen’s vid for “I’m on fire”? Totes putting rob in that riiiiiight abooooout now….mmmmmm

          • Actually no. But I looked it up and it was made the year before I was born (1986).

            It is pretty hot. The mechanic guy (is that Bruce?) looks like Hugh Jackman.

          • Mmmm… Hugh Jackman and Rob in mechanic’s jumpsuits… Mental porn is ensuing… I defs need a moment alone.

            Aren’t Rob and Hugh making a movie together later this year? If so… then dreams DO come true.

          • I had to give you a thumbs down, FB06 because you made me feel old and I got sadface.

          • Sorry for making you feel old, JodieO! I didn’t mean it. Really.


      • Oh shizz yeah, jump suit unzipped down to waste with a white tank underneath covered with grease and grease and dirt all over the arms, taking a long drag from a cigarette and wiping sweat from the brow…. I think I need a moment now…

        • It was made the year i was born yay! i didnt know that…and yes thats the boss….
          id be that desperately snobby rich girl for rob anyday….amen!
          aaaaaaand “moments” for everybody!

    • Going to my happy place now…I can just see his look! “No, I don’t actually do cars very well, but there are things I do better….”

      But I would love to see him in a library, never mind the reading. Rob AND books! How erotic! I would take him to tea afterwards… 🙂

  8. the Sofa King reference and “Chrismukkah” just made my whole day – and also the possibility of LTR/LTT t-shirts – yay!!

  9. I absolutely love my Bite Me notepads and have already doodled several Edwards when I am in my dreamy state… and, oh yeah, the to do list is useful too.

    I was going to keep them all for myself, but I did break down and give one away as a gift to a fellow Twilight lover who is not an avid internet user and thus does not get the advantage of your reading your imaginative blog…I feel bad for her as she could use a Twilight funny sometimes…

    • Hey, me too, I got mine in the mail today! I can’t wait to give them as gifts, but I ordered myself four of them 🙂

    • I got my notepads today too! I love them and plan on giving one away as a gift, but the rest are all mine….MUUUHAHAA. Thanks for letting us know about these gems.

      • Sorry for the double post, computer glitch…or I was too busy doodling on Edward to pay attention.

  10. I just recently made the Sofa King picture my background on my laptop.

    Something about his face says “Thanks. That was so good…” So I’ve started saying you’re welcome to my computer when I turn it on. That’s normal.

    • I did too!!!! It’s my motivation to keep working and stop scanning the internet. Every time I glance up from my desk, there he is staring at me with those ‘come f*ck me eyes”. Promising me a reward if I finish my work.
      Lately, I’ve become quite productive at work.

  11. Well he could be a high-powered executive just like in The Office :-). That’s kind of stuck in my mind forever now.

    These are all great though! I love the seasonal sales rep at Anthropologie. Yeah anyone would be coerced into buying a couch if he would be the salesperson. I think most of the sales would be to women!

    • I want to know why it is that everyone else loves The Office while I couldn’t get past the first couple of chapters? I just don’t get it. I love a ton of other raunchy fanfics. Why not that one?

      • I don’t know, maybe because he was such a jackass in the beginning? LOL He softens up a lot though. It’s a good story overall and I am not really into racy fanfics but this one’s fine w/ me :-).

        Actually my favorite one is Creature of Habit. Oh and I also like Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Which ones are your favorites?

        • I loved Creature of Habit! I’m reading one called Library Rendezvous that I like a lot.

          Also Art School Confidential-
          Edward is a nude model-woohoo! The models didn’t look like that when I was in art school.

          • I LOVE Art School Confidential!

          • Haha, okay I’m curious now, I’ll check these stories out. 🙂

        • My favorites are Edward Wallbanger, Emancipation Proclamation and The Fallout.

          While raciness is fine and dandy, there is a point where I have to draw the line. There is only so many times I can read the “three c’s” before I want to throw up.

          It is probably the jackass part. He just annoyed me.

          Maybe I’ll try to read it again sometime. 😀

          • Yeah there has to be a limit to all the sex, I mean they have to live normal lives too! LOL. There was one I started reading and I swear literally every minute that’s all they did. Anyway I didn’t go very far on that story. I need a good story line.

          • Ah so I tell the truth how I feel about racy fanfics and someone dares to give me a thumbs down. Geez, get over it.

          • People are mean w/ their thumbs down.

            Seriously. I can’t understand people who are all about sex, all the time.

            It gets a little old after awhile. You know?

          • @fangbanger – yes it does get old after a while. :-).

        • Tropic of Virgo is good – In_A_Blue_Bathrobe writes really well. Fannbanger is on it with the Emancipation Proclamation. It’s really really good. Everyone should check out The Hills of Twilight, the story and the blog, it’s a Desparate Housewives version of Twilight – it’s awesome.

      • keep reading, please keep reading! At least to chapter 10-if you’re not hooked by then, you never will be. But I think you’ll be drooling by that point.

        • I am reading “Library Rendezvous” at this very moment! Thank you for the link. 😀 😀 😀

        • And Art after 5 and Counterpoint-possibly one of my favorite Edwards of all time. I laughed, I cried, I held my breath waiting to see how it would all turn out-I just love these stories. Read them if you haven’t.

          • The List by LauraACullen- ok a lot of sex in here, but it’s fun!
            My Yes My No by lolashoes- great alternative conversations on the way back from Italy
            Snowed In by eclipsedawn- can’t wait for the final chapters

            yeah, I’ve been a liitle too involved with fanfic as of late. I blame it on the lack of good/new RPattz pics to surface since 2008.

            My t-shirt needs to say “A Vampire, A Girl, A Wolf a Cluster f*ck”
            Remember that one, ladies? It still makes me laugh. You are hilar. Always.
            Have a great day!

          • Ahh I want that t-shirt too!

            I swear I nearly choked on my tounge laughing so hard at all of those emo album titles

      • Really, Fang? I am somewhat shocked and awed that you didn’t read The Office. I bet it was the panty ripping. I just kept wondering how in the hell she could keep buying $350 drawers and he just keeps putting them in his pocket! She has a good ass job, throwing money away like that. I bet that’s why you couldn’t move forward with The Office.

        You are healed.

        Well, diagnosed, really.

    • You ladies are hilarious! There isn’t one post in which you don’t mention The Office in the comments! I love it. I’m still a fanfic V, but you guys are making me VERY curious to read what all the fuss is about.

  12. I have always visualized Rob as a college philosophy professor. The one sitting in the quad discussing the most random things that none of us would really care about but would listen cause he would be “enlightened” and we would hope he would take us back to his “office”.

    LTT/R shirts? Yes, please!

    • Yes! That is awesome.

      I bet he would give me an “A+” after I got done with him…

    • I see him more like one of the students though, getting into deeeeep conversations with his professors all serious-eyed and getting all straight A:s! He will have to get twenty years older before I see him in the professor loafers – but then, oh, how hot he would be!

  13. YAY! Can’t wait for the shirts! (although I might never wear them in public depending on how much they out me) YAY!

    • we’ll make sure there are some less obvious ones… we got your back…. the shirt on your back. HA

      • Wa wa waaaaa

        • I was actually hearing that in my head before I scrolled down to your reply. HEE!

  14. Rob could lay my carpet any time.

    • Yes, yes, yes!

    • oh thank god. i thought i was the only dirty-minded individual that was lolling over “rug specialist”!

      • it was begging to be said.

      • Wow. I’m slow. I didn’t get it until now! Hahahahaha!

  15. Clever as always Moon! I would definitely buy a brand new shiny silver VOLVO from Rob. Unfortunately, if it wasn’t for his movie stardom, I think Rob would be one of those 30 somethings that still live at home with mom and dad, occasionally earning a few bucks bartending and waiting for his big record deal, as he plays a few pubs on the weekend.

    I hope you go ahead with the t-shirts! I would love one saying, “That’s Normal.” This would be a perfect stocking stuffer for me, from me, since my stocking is always left empty. Thanks to forgetful hubby;oP My kids think I’ve been naughty, therefore, Santa doesn’t fill my stocking. Boo Hoo. This year I should fill it with hot Edward goodies – that will teach my forgetful hubby;o)

    • your vision of nonfamous Rob is so sad and true – like his “how to be” character.

      • This is the man I will end up with in the hopes that he does actually become the next Rob (although we all know there can only be one).

        How To Be! I love that film so much – so much cuteness.

      • Milfy goodness!!! I ❤ your name – makes me smile everytime I see your comments. OWN THE MILFness!!!!!

      • How to be was a documentary about Rob Pattinson.

    • I completely agree–he’s got some musical talent, but really his recorded songs are a little too non-mainstream. He would play at coffeehouses and pubs, work at dad’s car dealership and feel he was selling out his creativity. Thank goodness for us mom pushed him into acting and movies!

  16. U need a life! Me too! Let’s find one…going to google now.

  17. @sassy: oh hell yes, professor in tweed!

    T-shirt; can you get them in royal blue, like the jacket he wore to the MTV-MA? Or plaid? Black hoodies and Ray-Bans! White 1980’s-style sweats with Moon and UC’s pictures all over them? The possibilities are endless!

    • Yes, yes. Plaid tee shirts. Perfect for fall, and versatile too. You can wear plaid with jeans, you can wear it with Khaki, or, dress it up with a pencil skirt. OOOHHH, with leather.

      Show us the love Moonie and UC!!!

  18. First, I ♥ that we’re going to be able to get t-shirts! I will wear mine loud and proud!

    And I would totes buy a rug or a couch from Rob….as long as he came with delivery and tested it out in an afternoon demonstration that I got to partake in! 😉

  19. He’s Sofa King schmexy 😉

  20. How about Rob the masseuse? Yes please. I could totally see him passing on college for massage school. I would go see him. Yes, I would.

    Also, I would totally get swindled into buying a car from Rob. And I would most definitely ask him if he would mind going for a test ride…. in the back seat. Heyoo!

    • Does the Rob masseuse (Rob-seuse, if you will), give Happy Endings? Or would that be extra…?

      • I think it’s safe to assume that any time Rob touched me would result in a happy ending. Intentional or not… If-you-know-what-I’m-sayin-and-I-think-you-do-because-I’m-being-pretty-obvious-about-this.

        • If I could like this a million times, I would! HAHAHA!

          • Robseussed!

        • ❤ your face sister wife!

    • Rob the masseuse!
      I said it before and I will say it again. Fanfictions are born on LTR/LTT every day.

    • Come to think of it, I think I DID buy a bike from him once, the likeness is striking. And that was one crappy bike… Guess I wasn’t paying enough attention to the (right) details?

  21. Don’t have time to read all the comments today, but OH LORD! I would buy a Volvo from THAT guy anyday. DAMN! That first pic almost killed me.

  22. Rob as a National Geographic survival specialist.
    Plop him down in the middle of any metropolitan city and watch him navigate the “blacktop jungle” as he evades the wild hordes of “squealing fangirls” and errant taxi cabs.
    Surviving on Heineken and hotpockets.
    Wearing only the clothes he finds in dumpsters or can bum off friends.

    I see him as the Bear Grylls of Hollywood.

  23. I SO need that ‘rug specialist’ to do home visits!

  24. he’s complete and totally Sofa King perfect. *sigh*

  25. The Volvo dealer had me LOLing and my husband yelling from the other room “what’s so funny?” and me saying “do you really want to know?” (he’s home “sick” aka – just left to play golf), which clued him in that it was a Twi-thing, better left unexplained.

    Anyway – the To Do list was my favorite part. I think I should get a pad like that to write notes to my kids’ teachers. That would go over well I’m sure.

  26. Good morning Enablers,

    I have been wishing for a while that all the awesome bloggers, (LTT/LTR, Twitarded, Twigasm, etc.) get together and make something we could all wear to recognize each other.

    Something small and inconspicuous. Like how Kabbalists have that red sting on their wrist. Or weed enthusiasts have 4:20.

    Someone needs to design a logo that doesn’t scream “TWILIGHT dork” but WE all know what it is.
    Can be put on a small pin or button, totebag, wrist. etc.
    So that others in the secret society will know that I am in “the bubble” too!

    It’s easier than coming out of the closet to everyone you meet only to hang your head in shame as you scurry back in.

    DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!

    • I like this idea. I like this idea a lot.

    • Yes please! But what?????

      • How about a miniature dumpster? 🙂

    • It can be yet another competition!

      • competitions help me waste more time than reading LTT and LTR alone. Creative time wasting!

    • OK, I don’t know what any of that stuff means, but I get it. Like anorexics who wear red and dragonflies.

      We are in fact, members of a secret society. And we need to know how to recognize our kind.

      Agreed. We need a show of hands from the secret panel members, and the gavel for a logo shall fall.

      And we shall travel round the globe, and they will know us, and they will fear us and we will reign…

      Maybe too much caffeine today?

  27. What can you do to get me into a new Volvo, Rob?


    That is all.

    • Singing “Where you go I will follow, I will follow where you lead..” of course.

  28. Have I mentioned how much I love your allusions contemporary Christian music culture? Steven Curtis? Are you kidding me? What’s hilarious about that is that they actually look like a church trio … Taylor:”What are we going to wear this Sunday to coordinate?”
    Kristen: “How about we go with grey, black and white?”
    Rob: “That’s fine, but Kristen, remember to keep it modest. No sternum, no knees, please.”

    Fun fact: There is a video somewhere of me starring in a church production of The Great ARTrageous Adventure … a youth musical based on *that* Steven Curtis Chapman song and set in an art museum. Yeah.

    • That one made me snort out loud when I saw it! Then I couldn’t help but think about the rest of the lyrics. “Let’s follow our leader into the glorious unknown”. Then I started thinking about following Rob into the glorious unknown. Then I thought “I’m going to hell”. Normal, right?

      • Last night, I heard some kind of Christian song about a Lion and Lamb.

        All I could think about was Twilight.

        “Oh! Hi Satan.” *Takes ticket to hell*

        Hell will be full. 😉 At least, we will have good company, right?

    • LOL…these CCM references are NEVER lost on me either!

      • They are lost on me. I am a heathen.

        • Lost on me too, but that’s because I’m British.

  29. I think the t shirts (hoodies :-)) should be very discrete with a small “LTT: That’s Normal” or something. Then when you see a fellow wearer you can give them a small discrete nod.

    If I wanted something openly Twilight-obsessed I’d just go to Hot Topic right?

    • A small nod. Like bus drivers or Harley Riders do to each other.
      (I know what you are… Respect)

    • If I saw someone wearing our Secret Sign I’d want to pull them into a corner and jump up and down and squee, then talk Rob..otherwise, what’s the point??

      • You’re right!!! A total squeee moment with a stranger!

  30. I think Rob would make the ideal wedding singer…! Kind of like Adam Sandler’s Robbie in the Wedding Singer. He’d woo engaged women with his adorkableness and expert mumbling. le sigh.

    • No man in his right mind would allow Rob to sing at his wedding.

      • SO TRUE!!! lol

      • Oh, of course no MAN would hire Rob. Why would they…? The man can impregnate his fiancee with one look! But, if they truly love their girlfriends, they will 😉

      • If he sang at my wedding, I would have had second thoughts and may end up not getting married. I would have ran away with him!

  31. Sorry but I have to… Sheboygan….
    I think only a Wisconsinite would see that.
    But I would like to see Rob as a lounge singer here ; )

    • Fellow Wisconsinite… I was too excited over seeing a Wisconsin town named to correct it! And I am loling so hard that DH is getting annoyed. He keeps asking, I keep telling. You’d think he’d know better by now.

      I am so on board for a logo. Would save me some embarassment. No more staring at people at Hot Topic near the Twilight merch thinking, “Is she or isn’t she?”

  32. […] If Rob wasn’t famous – his other jobs « Letters to Rob – view page – cached What if you weren’t “Robert Pattinson” aka Edward Cullen? What if you weren’t the new Johnny Depp, or that guy who does “the Tuck” while playing Salvador Dali? Seriously, what would you… (Read more)What if you weren’t “Robert Pattinson” aka Edward Cullen? What if you weren’t the new Johnny Depp, or that guy who does “the Tuck” while playing Salvador Dali? Seriously, what would you do if you weren’t an actor? It’s hard to image (actually not at all, I have a very active imagination) but there’s some of the ideas I’ve come up with… (Read less) — From the page […]

  33. Yes!! I’d but a t-shirt (or a hoodie) any day.

    Just make sure they ship to europe. 🙂

    • With “MASEN” on the back, you mean? 😉

      • YESSS ! “Masen” LOL

  34. T-shirts? Yes! I know UC & Moon can come up with something that can really tell the world “I may or may not be a twilight/rob fan.” Do it!

  35. I’m totally into Rob the park ranger / tour guide at Yellowstone. Rob? Pretty please?

  36. I love how Rob is our little….paper doll! We love putting him in different scenarios…thinking about him in different ways…

    I wonder if he knows? He would laugh his ass off probably!

    As far as jobs go…I could see Rob as a writer. or homeless. or a chippendale. He’s so versatile!

    ❤ Ash

    • A homeless chippendale with photoshopped abs who busks outside coffee shops for a living.

      Stick with the day job, Rob!

  37. I’ll give Rob a Job. Just sayin’.


    • Oh Yeeeaah!

    • WIN!

  38. I shop at Antropologie all the time, and it will now never be the same.

    My Personal Manservant. A job with all the benefits he’d desire.

  39. Um yes, he can tickle my ivories any day!

    *Sign me up for at least 7 t-shirts! I want to have one for each day of the week. I need one with big daddy, one with fake lesbians, one with the jorted wolfpack, one “that’s normal”, one legal in Georgia, one ” I love creepy uncle” and one just plain LTT/LTR for those days I want to be discreet. I know you think I am being sarcastic, but I am totally serious. None of the people in the carpool line at school with know what the hell the t-shirts mean, and if they do, thats just awesome. They can be my new friend.

    Oh crap, I forgot about “Buttcrack Santa”. I guess I need 8 t-shirts. How do I pre-order?

  40. Microwave sales guy. He got the job because he wrote a mini-cookbook(free with every microwave purchase) titled “21 Microwave Recipes for Carrots”. It’s a pretty calm work environment at Big Al’s Appliance Haven, until Rob starts telling the surburban housewives about what he can do with a Hot Pocket- 🙂

    T-shirts are a great idea 🙂

  41. Rob as a hot, tan construction worker and the girls just oogle him all day long. I can’t get that Diet Coke commercial out of my mind-the one where the women all gather around the office window to watch the guy take off his shirt and sip DC. Ahhh…anyone else remember that bliss?

  42. Dog sitter, my personal dog sitter, I would buy a dog and Rob will be all day and NIGHT in my house and I will have the best excuse to live with 2 men!

  43. Chef Rob?? I’d gladly watch Rob microwave Hot Pockets in nothing but an apron….

  44. I was thinking about the Plain Gravy teeshirt and then I saw @3hboyshouse’s response above.

    So, the teeshirt for me would be black (huge) and would say “Plain LTT” on the front. Also comes in blue with “Plain LTR” on the front please.

    I think Rob has incredible long legs, so if he wasn’t an actor, he could carry on with the dressing up habit imposed upon him by his cruel older sisters. A drag act called Claudia would go down a storm in London and Broadway.

  45. […] If Rob wasn’t famous – his other jobs Dear Rob, What if you weren’t “Robert Pattinson” aka Edward Cullen? What if you weren’t the new […] […]

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