Posted by: Bekah | February 23, 2010

Robert Pattinson “special category” Oscar

With award season in full force and Rob’s hair begging us to get the focus off him, we’re exploring a special category for Rob at the upcoming Oscar awards through a fan submitted letter:

I'm preeettty sure I know what award Rob is winning here...

Dear Rob,

I saw the list of actors nominated for Academy Awards and your name was oddly missing from the list. Look, if Sandra Bullock can be nominated, why weren’t you? Isn’t one of the ideas behind receiving an award such as this, that the audience feel something deeply from the performance? I’m shocked that you were overlooked. You delivered, man. You took a difficult vamp role, with practically zero experience and made your character one of the most beloved and sexiest in current cinema.

Did the Academy not see the way you cracked that cell phone while you were in a dingy hotel in Brazil? Is it weird that that scene turned me on. What about the parking lot strut? My breathing hitched during this one. Did they miss the way you recited Romeo and Juliet for your English class in Forks? Yes, I admit it was understated, but I felt “something.” What about the look in your eyes when your skull cracks on the floor during the Volturi fight? Is it wrong that I practically bit through my lip during this scene? Rob, I’m sorry but I love seeing you get your *ss kicked.

What!? I won an Oscargasm!?

Every time I see these scenes, strange things happen to me, and surely this is the mark of great acting. I feel things when I see you on screen that I’ve never felt from any acting performance. Perhaps there should be a special Academy Award called, “Oscargasm,” just for you, Rob.

I felt that “special” feeling during Little Ashes as well and have very high hopes for Remember Me. If Bel Ami delivers on the sex, you will be nominated again and maybe the name of the special Oscargasm will simply be named the Robert Pattinsongasm award, but no will be able to do it the way you do. That’s what she said.

Thanks for doing it for me everytime, Rob,
mountainlion

See you at the Poll:

It’s been awhile since we’ve run one of our famous “See you at the Poll” polls. Today, let’s explore which of the following awards Rob deserves MOST:

What do you think!? What did I miss? Got any better award ideas for Rob?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter

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Responses

  1. Well kstew did win an elle “style” award, oscarrob all the way!!!

    • Yay first ever first! Thanks ML and thanks for THAT picture. S-woon!

      • Yes, thank you for posting that pic, which is second only to the Rob’s BIJ pic!

        • whoop….Rob BIJ !!!!!

          • Alright, at the risk of sounding like a moron (why should today be any different?), what is BIJ?

          • Excellent, a reason to post it!

            As Jules said: Zoom, baby, zoom!
            http://twitpic.com/su1tr

            some say its a manip, but some choose to believe.
            Rob’s Big in Japan.

          • Drsaka…you KILLED me again,WHERE have you that pic? under your laptop? pronto pronto to post it??? ❤
            🙂

          • no, I just cut and pasted from the last time it was posted!

          • Oh my!!! Why have I not seen this pic before?

            Rob definitely seems, umm, “happy” to be in Japan!

          • drsaka, is it normal that I’m more interested in reading the comments than looking at the photo? I mean, really. The comments make me laugh so hard.*

            *Now, if I had written it the way those commenters did, I would say “SO HARD.”

          • The comments are great too!

          • hahahahaha
            Drsaka, you’re so trigger happy with the BIJ.
            You know I believe and I have faith in the BIJ.
            The M word is pure blasphemy!

          • I’m just trying to be fair and present both sides of the argument! I choose to believe.

          • I’ve changed “religion” to believe it ….lol

          • Oh Robgirl, I ❤ you.
            This is the best religion ever.
            We'd all like to refer to Rob as God, oh God.

          • drsaka….I’ve zoomed (and am now laughing like a drain) that’s not manip…it’s not, it’s not, it’s not. I am a believer, and so loving that Rob BIJ manages, without fail, to make an appearance every day.

            Long live RBIJ.

          • I can’t take credit for spotting BIJ at all: I just post it a lot. Jules alerted me of it. I’m not sure who was the original eagle-eyed spotter- bless you, whoever you are!

          • Well Rob appears to be BIJ in more ways than one. I voted Oscargasm, but now *opens link again and takes another good look*, can I vote all of the above.

    • The next thing you know, mullets will be all the rage. 😀

      • Kstew’s voice cracked at the end of her BAFTA acceptance “speech” and I have to say that was one of the first endearing things I’ve seen her do.

        • awww…i think that her socially inept skills are what make me NOT hate her. but if you threw any other broad into the “Rob ring”, i would want to hit-a-bitch. with her, eh, not so much. 😉

  2. a robertpattinsongasm award…

    Brilliant, ML!

  3. I can’t decide which award to vote for. Rob deserves them all.

    I’m thinking if we can get him to win the SAC award, it will encourage future free-ballin’.

    • A million thumbs up for your use of the phrase “free-ballin.”

      • It’s a good phrase to try and slip into conversation as much as possible.

    • Everytime I hear ‘free-ballin’ I start singing Free Fallin…that needs to be a total remake.

      • Relieved to know I am not the only one!!!

        • Weird Al needs to do one of his parodies.

          The video could just be pictures of Rob’s crotch.

          • Dive bombing in with the crotch collage…

          • Is it wrong that I studied that collage long enough to know that he prefers to keep it to his left? That was almost too pervy… even for me.

        • LOL! I do the same thing!! Now I’m freeeeee… free-ballin’…

        • Good hell, count me in too.

      • Me too!

        • TOO- I zoomed in on the pic (robpuke) that was posted yesterday, that you talked about. Yes, some between the eyebrows maintenance is called for! And I still can’t decide on his eye color (I’m sure its been talked about here before, but I missed it). Its so changeable (or at least changeable in different lighting for pics)- its ‘The Unique to Rob eye color’.

          Jenny Lumet, in the now infamous interview, called them ‘kaleidoscope eyes’. I don’t like this- any Beatles song lyrics should be left alone.

          How about pewter bluegreen?

          • Yes, unique to Rob, like so many things.

            I wish all photos of Rob were so zoom-able, but alas, they lose the resolution we need to ascertain certain things, close up. You know what I’m talking about.

      • Speaking of songs, Does the mention of “Oscargasm” make anyone else think of this song”

  4. BAFTA, baby 😛

    • hellz ya!!

      +1

    • The BAFTAs should ditch their little mask award and make a statuette of Rob, in all his underwear-less glory. Kinda like an Oscar. To immortalize all the traits a BAFTA winner should possess. They don’t have to make many, because how many other people besides Rob would be worthy?

      • Did you see his hair that night? I think they actually took a mold of him for it. Thing looked scarely like him.

  5. I had to go with BAFTA. I’ve never read a more perfect description of Rob. I’m going to start using that when people ask me why I love him.

  6. I honestly can’t decide, but whichever award makes him say something as funny as ‘I’ve got a little coming out of my pants’, has my approval.

  7. Oh mountainlion, your letter Itself nearly gave me an Oscargasm! I think about 60% of my recent “gasms” have been Rob Pattinsongasms, ifyouknowwhatimsayin.

    • SStrand, I have to say I’ve been sorely tempted to whip the chart and indulge in a lil bingo, since it’s publication we’ve had PlaidRob, AwardsRob & PhotoshootRob! Well done! Chart it and ye shall receive!

      • Oh yes we have. And they’ve all been amazing. I only wish AwardsRob was true to form and going commando. I have spent more time than I should admit going over his BAFTA pics, zooming and highlighting the erm, crotch region. He’s def wearing something under those pants this time dammit.

        • His trip to M&S has covered all bases. Damn him! Plus he’s pocket sized the chart & laminated it, so busted!

          • OMBB. I would freakin die if when I finally get my moment with Rob, he pulled the chart out of his back pocket. There would be no words as I would instantly choke on my Hot Pocket (or whatever else happened to be in my mouth at the time (TWSS)) and die. I would then miss ‘finishing’ my finally moment with Rob and hate myself for eternity for even creating the damn chart. I have a vivid imagination this morning. Must be from studying DetailsRob before bed last night. 😉

    • I ❤ you, SS.

      Thanks!

      • ML – Great letter!
        I haven’t voted yet, it’s too hard to decide.

    • SS,
      Re: the crotch collage, where is that photo from… where Rob is wearing no shirt and just pj’s? It’s in the 3rd row and thanks so much for posting that…

      hugs…

      • The Haunted Airman, when he falls off the bed from thinking he sees the spiders everywhere and drops his lighter on the floor.
        God, I need to get a life!

  8. After Rob has manyy more years of successful acting experiences, Moon and UC should come up with a special category for the Lifetime Achievement Award for him: most women ruined? most women rendered incoherent?

    Other thoughts?

    • and mountainlion, of course! She’s in charge of the category!

      • yes she will have to appreciate and deliberate and sleep on it, to take the right decision.

      • my apologies to mountainlion- its her great post!

    • bhahahah “Lifetime Achievement Award for him: most women ruined?” or instantly pregnant or increased divorced/break-up reason! lol

    • Man Most Women See While Having Sex With Their S/O. I don’t think I’m the only one.

      • Must have been an awkward night for Mickey Rourke.

        • Mickey Rourke-he gets the Hot Young Guys, Take Warning! award.

          • Mickey Rourke gave me a serious NIGHTMARE!!! He has no ears anymore….and that’s not the worse part of his face….

          • Robgirl…I love Mickey Rourke, even though he know looks like he’s been hit with the ugly stick…he’s still doing it for me….yes I know i have weird taste.

          • now not know! doh!

          • MINE! I just wonder why he did it…I mean he was a nice guy…..

          • probs all those punches he took to the head, couldn’t have done his face much good. Man he was so yummy when he was younger, I have a copy of Angelheart (would love a copy of barfly – MR playing Charles Bukowski bloody loved that drunk poet, sadly missed 😦 (…also liking MR in Sin City (cracking film….lord I sound like wallace!)

  9. Grammy: Awarded to someone who is: British, Plays Acoustic, Hot, Shy, F*uckable, Fred Flintstone Beard, Drinks Heineken, Possesses Long Fingers….(yipppy)

    • ….long legs and sexy hips! Misty, sorry…I HAD to add it 🙂

      • no no I love it Robgirl!!!

        +1

  10. LOVE the “Oscargasm” Mountainlion!

    And will you look at his smirk in that first picture. He knows that we know he knows.

  11. Haha, mountain, I think you can “do it” as a member of the Academy and you can also “do it” working for Rob. I wonder what you would choose. But I know you will work very hard and his appreciation will be growing and growing.
    And the Oscar for the best bulge goes to… suspense…

    • …….drum roll……..”Rob Big in Japan”……yipheeeeee

  12. Kentucky Fried Chicken Award: he’s just so finger-lickin’ good (if you know what I’m sayin’) 🙂

    x

    • like that.don’t wanna spoil but ther is a scene someone like that at Bel ami,just with pear

  13. ‘Oh God, oh God, we can’t breathe. It’s true – Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are definitely a couple!

    This is AMAZING! It means that Twilight is a REAL STORY!’

    WTF….this is the opening from an article I just had the misfortune to open……people are just bloody nuts. Am stunned by the stupidity of some.

    Sorry off track….I think Rob should win all of the above, but if I have to pick one I’m going to have to go for the BAFTA..mmmm or maybe the SAC, but then again he’d defo qualify for the oscagasam…..:) to difficult, he should get them all.

    • yes, he should get them all!!!!!!!!!!

    • haha your sarcasm makes me smile

      • But does it make you Cullen Smile?

    • I had the same thoughts yesterday. But I read so much more bulls** it wasn’t even funny… Seriously.
      This stuff gets out of hands….

  14. i was undiceted btw oscargasm and bafta and it’s seems everone is
    i agree lion they underestimate his performance.hope not for Bel ami 🙂

    • Che,

      I love what you said yesterday about the many faces of Rob (i.e. last week “hating vaj,” this week giggly, baby-faced Rob).

      Thanks for bringing that up.

      lion

      • your welcome it’s a pleasure for me and that’s why i love him

        • That’s why we all love him che… That’s why we all love him.

      • Lion, thanks for your letter, I simply love it!!! ❤

  15. I was wavering between the Oscargasm and the SAC… But then can’t they both win? Wouldn’t we ALL win in this case?

    And yeah. My local news reported on Rob and Kstew this morning. My local news. Seriously.

    • Mine did too! It came on the minute I turned on the tv. They said he told The Sun that yes, they were a couple. But The Sun is a rag and the news spelled his name Pattenson, so I didn’t take it seriously.

      • Yeah, I heard it was reported by a rag. No real news, I guess.

        Pattenson… Ha! The news anchor kept saying “Pattison”. I cringed. It’s Pattinson! RON PATTINSON! morons…

        • You made me choke on a grape.

          RON PATTINSON

          I would prefer his name to be Roy…he just looks like a Roy to me.

      • well dazzle and Katie S…..I’m having problems with it myself, it’s the Sun for crying out loud. I’m sure they are together, but I can’t believe for one second that RP would talk to them…it would be like selling your soul to the devil and quite frankly, if he did he would seriously go down in my estimation. It’s a terrible tabloid, second only to the News of the World.
        On the other hand there have been no denials, no refuting this article…so maybe it’s true he really did talk to the Sun. Just can’t believe he’d do something that crass.

        • I don’t think it’s worth his people making a denial. If he was going to out Robsten after all this time, he’d do it with a legitimate outlet. I can’t believe he’d spill to a paper that’s probably written all kinds of lies about him in the past.

          • I’m just waiting for the sex tape.

          • D2D,

            I wonder if he purposely outed robsten in a trashy newspaper just because he likes to do the ‘counter-culture’ thing? Just wondering…

            lion

        • It’s a load of rubbish and why would Nick his Manager even deign to acknowledge this load of tripe….yes…Rob would spill his heart to ….THE SUN!!!!! I think not LOL! This isn’t the only ridiculous story on the British tabloids blogs…read the one from the ‘3.00am Girls’ blog in The Daily Mirror ….very bitchy and VERY unfair. I left a comment. Looks like the British press has finally caught up with the lad…poor sod.

          • Is that the one about him being rude at the BAFTAs and not talking to anyone on the way in, being all moody and sullen and basically very unRob like? Oh, and behaving badly at the after awards dinner i.e leaving during the serving of food????….mmmmm if I remember rightly he was one of the few celebs who spent time signing autos on the way in, they thought he would be late cos he was spending so much time with the fans. And surely he left early cos he had to get up for filming on bel ami which supposedly started at 6.30am

            If that’s the article you are talking about, yes I read that and thought that it was pretty crappy thing to write about him.

          • +1 @mine

          • @MineMineMine
            Yep that’s the one….bitches.

  16. Great post, mountainlion! I’m totally with you on the “Oscargasm”….Rob’s particular talents are under-appreciated. 🙂

  17. That letter totally killed me this morning. Thanks for the funny!!!

    God, I was torn between Oscargasm and SAC award. I went with SAC, because I know that he’ll do just that, again. Just the thought of this, will force me to stare at his crotch at every red carpet event. Wait, I already to do that…

    • love your avi!!!

  18. ML,
    Loved this! I think you should submit your idea to the Academy-they’ll do anything for ratings it seems.
    The Oscargasm-presented to Robert Pattinson (only). I like it.

    And I loved those scenes,too. The parking lot strut gives me goosebumps every time. I thought the Brazil scene was pretty powerful.I can’t think of a more deserving candidate for the Oscargasm.

  19. “Did the Academy not see the way you cracked that cell phone while you were in a dingy hotel in Brazil? Is it weird that that scene turned me on.”

    No.

    I too have been fantasizing about dingy Brazilian hotel rooms and cracked jitterbugs since November.

  20. what was the discussion about

    I’m still at …. the parking lot strut….

    • Me too! Me too!

      I melted in my seat. Total Oscargasm moment! He wins! We win!

  21. Totally for the ratings!! I lmao’d and simaltaneously hid behind a cushion when Rob got name checked at the baftas.

    • Sorry that was in reply to DtoD and the ratingswhores at the oscars/baftas/award ceremony where Robs going.

      • I saw that he was like what the hell your mentioning me along with Dustin Hoffman and Kate Winslet !!!

  22. That was awkward, wasn’t it? And he looked a bit embarrassed (but really cute).

    • Major 2nd hand embarassment for him my husband looked at me like I was demented… Sigh. It’s v difficult to now see him as just another celeb with others present I feel supercreepy knowing how much I know about someone I don’t actually know re: never will know.

      There’s something in the air today about
      knowing. Re B-naa post somewhere above.

      • Drats meants A-not an addikt.

  23. I had a very strange moment today and I only blame it on you girls…
    I saw a poster of a Elephant while in a bus and I yelled “Rob!” right then and there. The people looked at me like I was insane…

    And thanks to the picture above my mum calls me a perv now ( I zoomed that picture until it wouldn’t zoom anymore…)

    Congrats to the letter ML! Coulnd’t have said it better myself!

  24. I vote for the SAC award because well, a commando Rob in a D&G tux is beyond win. He hangs to the right.

  25. Mmmmm, he should win an Oscargasm for sure!

    • several Oscargasms, Jena

      • Multiple.

  26. I love lion! ❤
    I loved the baftas!
    I love Rob!

    I'd give him ANY award HE desiderates….and of course I'll hand it over personally!!

  27. Great post, mountainlion! He’s deserves every one of those awards, and more!

    Off-topic: is it normal that I have arranged my entire day around finding and purchasing my very own copy of Details magazine?

    • Thanks for the reminder, T.O.O!

  28. ….and lion
    what can I say about your letter?? You forgot the best prize for him……
    just YOU with a red BOW!

    🙂

    • Ok! As soon as you and MP are his new PR people (how cool would that be?), please arrange said ribbon wearing.

      • Yes, ML, thanks for your post!! I think you’re on to something there with RG and MP as his new PR people!!!

        • Too lovely you two today…I have no clue about PR! Just sayin…
          🙂

  29. Love the letter, ML! If I didn’t know better, I’d say you read fanfic. Your “breath hitched” and you bit your lip? LOL.

    Love Rob in a tux. Love Rob, period.

    • ha ha i thought that too, at least she didn’t have to “let go of a breath she didn’t know she was holding!”
      great letter mountain lion, he should just get all of them!!

  30. My fav Rob (and men in general for that matter) is him in a suit. I refuse to say tux because it reminds me of tuxedo mask (sailor moon; you can google it).

    But the I did not like the bafta’s suit. I can’t but my finger on why but I just don’t… Oscar Rob is my fav Rob.

    And did I hear something about present and only wearing a bow? Can we include that into the “Robert Pattinson project?” 😉

    • blame the typing mistake on my phone…

      It should have said “Robert Pattinson birthday project”. I’ll explain it as soon as I have figured it out completely…

  31. Way to go, ML, love your post! I’m so late in coming today and I’m kind of loopy so forgive me if I don’t make much sense today!

    Anyway I definitely chose the BAFTA for Rob in the poll :-).

    • I already missed you! Seriously!
      I gave you another half an hour to show up, or I would have sent a searching unit…

    • Hey SB!

  32. ML- brilliant letter! I too definitely feel lots of strange somethings deeply (and sometimes deeper, but never quite deep enough) when big-screen Rob (and little-screen, too!) is in front of me. The fingers, the cell phone, the jaw, the strut, the look, the *ss-kicking, the giggle, that one lock of hair that just won’t be tamed…
    Robgasm!
    xoxo-obava

  33. My dearest LTR chicas,

    last week I started a post about kellan vs. Cristiano… The poll had 6 possibilities -one of them Rob.
    Today I was shocked to find out that Cristiano had 71 of 83 votes! And even kellan has more than rob! Please go and fix this…
    Love,
    B

    http://www.thecoldshower.wordpress.com
    just scroll down to the kellan vs. Cristiano post and vote for rob! Safe my sanity j/k

  34. You forgot the Indie Spirit awards.. They should have a special award for robbie as well.. how about the:

    Hot Hobo Luv Award:
    Awarded to a male or female who despite looking dissipated,debauched and dessolute and or ( like they crawled out of the dumpster), can still make you want to have dirty sex with them.

    • Yes, Rob needs to get some awards!! He is much more deserving of an award than some people I can think of (hmm, a certain mulleted one comes to mind…).

      Rob, with or without an award, I still ❤ you in a big way.

      • re: Miss Mullet –BUT SHE GOT A BAFTA! (wow!). And Robbie didnt! (double wow) All the Twihard Bella supporters voted for her online. She’s got her own little mullet army. So don’t mess with her!

        It would have behooved her… if she was prepared at the BAFTA.
        Actors who can actually articulate are important in the UK.
        Secondhand embarrassment!! . auuughh!!
        I bet she never lets that happen again (one hopes)

        PS Dazzle – Good to see u too! I’ve been lurking — Reading these posts mostly.
        TomStu (my little cupcake) was recently in Santa Barbara, CA promoting his movie “Waiting for Forever” le sigh….
        He looked prettier than his co-star.
        I have a pic of him cradleing a baby…awww. (from the movie)

        • That BAFTA award is a bit of a joke-no one else stood a chance with KStew’s legions of crazed fans. And an Elle Style award-her PR people must be working overtime. I don’t get her at all.

          Glad you got to see TomStu!!

  35. @ Dazzle….yessss my little TomStu! le sigh..

    Anyway.. a bit of gossip for you and the girls I heard while at this movie festival in Santabarbara-

    Robbie is slated to come out in a movie called “Water for Elephants”.. (retitled: Circus).
    He is to play the lead (a young drifter vetenarian). –Sean Penn was slated to play the antigonist (the abusive animal trainer) opposit Pattinson. But when Pattinson got signed for the project Penn dropped out.. (mysterously).. some say he didnt want to come out with him.. Penn is supposively a bit of a snob when it comes to acting with what he terms “real” actors.. (ouch).

    • You mean he dissed his “good friend” KStew’s bf?? *Shock* Next time they run into one another she won’t be so friendly.

      I loved the book- can’t wait for the movie. Even without Mr. Penn.

      • What gets me is he thought kstew was good enough for Into the Wild, but Rob isn’t good enough for Circus? Can’t figure that out at all.


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