Posted by: Bekah | November 7, 2009

The Rob Pattinson Travel Guide

Dear Rob,

I wish I were kidding when I say that seeing you in the Vanity Fair pictures this week made me really miss the time when I lived in New England 7 years ago. Not only was it so beautiful, but I met a man (who I married 4 years later) and a friend that I now call Moon. It got me thinking about taking a trip. So I stopped by my local travel agent on the way home from work the other day and picked up some guides. The guides were so uninspiring.  Cheesy couples hugged during cheesy sunsets while they drank cheesy Caribbean drinks wearing cheesy Hawaiian shirts.

It got me thinking about how much tourism money a town would make if they just used your image in their travel guides. Cape Cod & Martha’s Vineyard, are you listening? This is how you sell a vacation:

something warm

shops

pjs

book

walkofshame

thousandwords

or at least a thousand dirty thoughts...

optional

See you in Gay head!

Love,

UnintendedChoice

Seriously. Moon and I spent 4 months living in Martha’s Vineyard with D. Choice. We’re not making this up. If you ever get up there, you won’t be disappointed.  Those 4 months are some of the ones I cherish the most! And it’s not just because I did zero studying and only made out with D. Choice the entire time…:)

Thanks to Zephyersky, Pixiechick, SassySmart, and JodieO for making all of these. You are the best. Always. XOXO

I just realized why this week we’ve had a TON of gay porn spam in our spam filter: Gay head anyone?

Discuss where you want Rob to take YOU on vaca on The Forum
That biatch, Moon, who had an incredible night last night and saw the ENTIRE Twi cast, says something on LTT (probably not about her night. But read about it on Twitter!)


Responses

  1. He can take me to his hometown. I’m DYING to go to London. All the amazing shopping, the gorgeously rainy weather, the cold, the scenery. Wow.

    Seriously though, Rob really could boost tourism. Anywhere. Hell, I’m pretty sure he could even boost tourism in Brisbane’s bogan suburbs!
    xox

  2. Good Lawd. I’ve missed out on the whole “walk of shame” thing but Rob is hawt.

    The mother in me says, “Smoking is bad. There are cooler ways to die.”

    The other part says, “Umm. Rob? Can I bum a smoke?”

    Never smoked anything in my life (with one, very weird exception) but DAMMIT ROB you make me crave cigarettes. Yuck.

    • I will defend your conflicted thoughts! It’s the way his mouth looks when he smokes! It looks all pouty and wonderful.

      I’m sure you’d have the same reaction of he was just chewing on a pencil.
      Hmmm

      • Chewing on a pencil in a suggestive manner would work for me…it’s the lips, the lips. (Take, oh, take those lips away..because I sure as hell need to get some sleep now!)
        Let him smoke if he wants to: I plan on having him before the lung cancer gets him anyway!
        But seriously, my boyfriend’s dad died of that disease and it ain’t pretty, so please, Rob consider choosing chocolate cigarettes instead. It’s all about the lips, anyway…

    • You’re so right, smoking is bad, but to me so sexy, it’s like a Rock’nRoll attitude , a bit “forbidden” and “not healthy”but it’s like “I don’t care…” and I don’t know why, but it works a lot!

  3. Rob could sell tourism to Mars.

    (uh, can someone enlighten the unenlightened; what’s the Walk of Shame thingie?)

    • When you go out with your girls, meet some guy in a bar that you just know is “intelligent and so funny!” or “quiet, but hawt” and you go home with him… Then, the next morning, you wake up and the guy next to you looks less like Mr. Paddleston and more like Big Daddy…. So you put on your dirty bar clothes and try to find your keys, then head out to the car with your head down – praying no one can see you…
      That, my dear is the walk of shame.
      (Rob, if you’re not clear on this, I’d be happy to demonstrate!)

      • Do guys HAVE a Walk of Shame? I always assumed they had a Strut of Victory? Unless of course they woke up next to a Big Daddy as well…

        • Don’t know if guys do have a walk of shame,
          but it looks like an amazing thing, this walk-of-shame-thing!
          I want that SHAME-ROB, now!

      • AH got it. cheers.

  4. hi guys yea i agree, i think Rob is a very influential marketing tool of anything include tourism resort. i come from Indonesia, a country whose a beautiful land called Bali. Bali has been the greatest contributor of tourism industry for our country for years. It has very beautiful beach and Bali is considered as one of the city whose has unique, rich and artistic culture. However, because of terrorist bombing in 2002 and 2005, we’ve been incredibly suffered significantly. Back to topic (why Rob could be hired as tourism ambassador), i bet u have seen Rob often wear blue shirt with short sleeved ( the one in Remember Me set). YES, when i saw it 4 the first time, i jumped hysterically because Rob wore a shirt KUTA Beach Bali!!! It means (4 me), (1) he (possibly) ever went to Bali, a place where i spent my holiday when i was young (“will u come to again, please??)” (2) i love him more because he still wants to wear the shirt even the fact there were British tourists died during the bomb attacks (while the others maybe a little bit cynical, i dont blame ’em). So Rob thank you very much (even you realize or not), because of you some fans (in another blog, i dont remember which one and when) acknowledge Bali and google it.

  5. Rob can take me to Isle Esme – cause it’s real right? And I’m a dab hand with the old vacuum cleaner for when the feathers go flying 🙂

    x

    • Don’t you dare vacuume those feathers! You bronze them and sell them on ebay. (If you can part with them, of course)

      • I think Cazza was making a metaphor for her very own “sucking abilities”. Or maybe I”m just turned on by those toursim ads above and I have a dirty mind. By the way “I always assumed they had a Strut of Victory? Unless of course they woke up next to a Big Daddy as well…”…..I laughed. Maybe I even snorted. Maybe.

  6. Walk of Shame! No shame in that, my friend. And that has GOT to be my favorite picture of him ever. The perfect arch of the eyebrow? Notice how big the shoe is?

    I want him to take me to the English countryside and he can alternate between reading Keats to me and, well, you know…

    Those VF shots are inspiring.

    • Word! No walk of shame, but walk of endless beauty and coolness….my fav.pic ever and with ever I mean a week….to much choice!<3

  7. LOVE New England! Went to my SIL’s wedding in early Sept. in NH. Nothing says NE like a lobstah-bake (Robstah-bake) reception (my husband had THREE).

  8. Rob can take me EVERYWHERE!

  9. sweater optional! i am died. i love you.

  10. Wow!! Wiping drool off of chin…

    His mouth looks so nice in that last photo with the sweater half on. I could help him with removing said sweater, if he’s struggling with it. It’s too girly-looking anyway.

    The Walk of Shame photo…Holy Mother of Christ. He looks !#$%&*? amazing. They must have dressed him, because the buttons are lined up. I SO WANT THAT JOB!! “Oh, Rob. Hold still, please. I’m so sorry. I keep missing that bottom button. Let me try one more time, please.”

    Are those P.J.s that he’s wearing, in that photo with the Corona and blanket? OMG.

    His hair looks so fantastic in every photo. So delicious…

    This definitely made my day…

  11. I love that walk of shame pic. A LOT.

    • All he needs (for me) is his sunglasses and that stupid leather wrist brand-that I can’t explain why it’s sexy- and I’ll never want to look at anything else again.

      • OH t.G. I’m not the only one that finds the wristbrand an instant panty-dropper. It probably stinks and is all nasty the way leather gets when you wear it ALL THE TIME (cuz we know he doesn’t bother taking it off to shower or anything..as rare an event as that might be). BUt there’s just something about that that just…..uh…..yeah. you know.

  12. If you’re pickin’ up what I’m puttin’ down….just sayin. I feel like superimposing Rob’s head on one of the bodies.

    • I bow to you.
      Best use of Wubzy, EVER. (How can this show be on 4 times a day in my house and I’ve never seen this???!??!)

      • Thank God someone else got it!!! I was hearing crickets….I felt stupid for thinking that I had a win.

        • Sit down.. have some plaid…

          I also bow to you… and like Poochi said… its ALWAYS on at my house too and can’t believe i missed that!!!!!

  13. “In Cape Cod even the walk of shame looks good.”

    I love this.

  14. The Cape Cod one is my fave. God, that man can rock a pair of blue jeans and a cotton shirt. Now put him down, USA – and send him home to us in London, thank you.

    That is all.

  15. LOVE the Walk of Shame one. lol!!

    M

  16. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by gayblacktravel and Efrosyni Adamides, TwilightJewelry.us. TwilightJewelry.us said: The Rob Pattinson Travel Guide « Letters to Rob http://bit.ly/43MUc7 […]

  17. Every time I see one of these (incredibly amazing leave-me-breathless) photos of Rob cracking his knuckles it irks me. His poor poor piano playin’ hands. Crack them outward Robward!!! You’re gonna have decrepit crepitus arthritic hands before your 60 if you keep cracking them inward. I so bady want to work those hands whenever I see this…..I mean cuz I’m a reflexologist. I mean it in a purely professional way (yeah right).

    • Interesting – I flex my fingers a lot too, for recreational purposes, 🙂 and a physiologist told me that contrary to popular belief there was no danger in doing that for your hands. So, do I need to get a second opinion? (Rob, hold my hand while I visit the doctor, please..)

  18. These are awesome! My favorite one is the picture where he is going to the car/SUV holding his shoe. So hot! I’ve said it many times, I’m not a smoker but he makes smoking look so hot!!! No one else can affect me this way. Sigh…ayayay.

  19. I already have our perfect vacation mapped out. (Won’t give you the plans, though. Right, Rob, I’m mailing them to you, of course!) But aside from that, who are you kidding; we would go anywhere with Rob, be it a mouldy cabin on a Dutch campsite or a freezing cold bunk bed on the Outer Hebridees. (Yes, been there, done that.) With Rob, Happy Place is anywhere… *sigh*

  20. haha.. gay head..
    still can’t get over that one.
    what a double entrende.

    love it.
    speaking of G-head…
    (where o where is TomStu!)

  21. my new avitar isnt working!
    whats up with that?

  22. have mercy!
    i want rob to take me to bust some headboards and bite some pillows at isle esme! ❤

  23. Saw preview for “Pirate Radio” yesterday. Looks like TomStu has finally arrived! The movie seems funny and old Tom gets to shag a starlet or two.

    Rob, I’m curious, do you think there’s room for two under that blanket?


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