Posted by: themoonisdown | November 2, 2009

Rob in Japan and maybe also a Toxic Relationship


Smile and the world smiles with you!

Dear Rob,

Remember when we said “if we blog it you will come?” Yea, well you were listening cause obviously you pay a lot of attention to what UC and I say every day and you showed your face! After almost a month you’ve finally come out of whatever hole you’ve been hiding in and decided to grace us with your presence. Sure, you had to leave your hotel to actually go to the airport and get on a plane but I like to think it’s because we asked you to reveal yourself and you listened. Even though you were sullen and surly looking I still looked at the pictures and longed for “old” Rob. Sullen Rob just makes me angry (ask UC, I told her I’d rather stay in my Chris Weitz bubble than look at you all sad-like). But after looking at Sunday’s pictures of you arriving in Japan, all smiles, it hit me. Your proximity to KStew and the paparazzi are directly proportional to the smile on your face.

Rob, my dear I think you might be in what folks like Dr. Phil and Dr. Laura call a “Toxic Relationship.” Hear me out on this one… first let’s back up a bit…

I was talking with UC on the phone and I said can you imagine getting off a 15+hr flight, feeling all gross from the plane and knowing you’re going to face INSANE crowds, have pictures and flashes going off and yet YOU WERE SMILING!!! If there was ever a time to be sullen and annoyed it would have been today in Japan! But you weren’t! Instead you were all annoyed looking leaving Vancouver for a 4 hour flight back to LA with KStew where you were not greeted by HALF the frenzy you were in Japan. So I was thinking it must be the KStew connection. For this trip you are flying with your team Nick and Stephanie (good to see you all back!) and director Chris Weitz (and his man purse) and no 19 yr old. What did you guys do on that long ass flight that made you so smiley when you got off compared to the little Vancouver flight?

Vancouver to LAX

  • Mile high club initiation gone bad. You ended up with with the faucet up your ass and the flight attendant knocked on the door wondering what all the racket was

    be sullen and you're sullen alone

    Be sullen and you're sullen alone

  • The peanuts were salted not dry roasted
  • You were late to catch the flight and missed that cute little video about buckling your seat belts
  • You lost your favorite plaid shirt AND Lobster hat somewhere in your hotel room and after 3 days of searching still couldn’t find it and it was time to leave
  • Kristen talked to the guy in the window seat about cats for 4 hours. She was on the aisle and you were stuck in the middle. (This might be one of the 7 layers of Hell)
  • You were NOT on the cover of this airlines inflight magazine
  • There was no inflight movie just 2 episodes of “Everybody Loves Raymond” and you hate to say it but everybody does NOT love Raymond

So what happened on that Japan flight that made you so smiley?
Follow the cut to find out!

LAX to Japan



    Sail away with me, to another world where we rely on eachother uh huh, from one lover to another UH HUH!

    You guys had an intense double elimination tourney pairing you and Stephanie against Nick and Chris in a winner takes all card game tournament. You KILLED it on the Solitaire and Speed rounds. Chris gave you a run for the money in Old Maid. It was a close call but you and Stephanie won when she called Nick’s bluff in BS. Chris and Nick now have to karaoke duet on “Islands in the Stream” and “Total Eclipse of the Heart” as payment for losing

  • You were high on the legal dosage limit of Ambien and Dramamine. Nick and Stephanie told you that if you get off the plane 1000 Tom Stu’s would be waiting for you with open arms and a carton of Parliments
  • Chris showed you test footage from that foreign exchange student scene in American Pie that got cut. You then spent the rest of the flight begging Stephanie and Nick to ask Summit to recast Shannon Elizabeth as Bella
  • The peanuts were DRY ROASTED this time
  • The inflight movies were Debbie Does Japan and A Night at the Roxbury

Touching me there makes me smile!

So whether or not it was your traveling companions, the peanuts or the inflight movies something’s different about you in Japan and I LOVE IT! If you’ve got a free moment between Karaoke, press and shopping for Hello Kitty stuff for me you might take that “Are you in a Toxic Relationship” quiz I sent you, otherwise just keep on smiling cause as Ms Clariee says “Smile, it increases your face value!”

Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto!

PS Bring it on TammyO and the haters, I can take it.

So what do you all think? Why’s he appear to be in a good mood now and for the last few months has been a sad little baby? Is everyone just glad to see Rob back?

Talk about your toxic relationships on The Forum
We begin managing our expectations over at LTT

Pictures: Robsessed and OK Mag


  1. This is my first time commenting here. I love the site and descovered it not long ago.
    I agree with you who say that Rob’s mood changes when Kristen is around.
    She seems to be one of those people who expects others to adapt to her personality and she would never go towards other people. Rob said it himself that when they met he tried to be serious because she was always serious and she seemed not to like him.
    Everyone walks on eggshels around her because slightest look or comment could piss her off. I couldn’t be around such a person for a long.
    Rob is too patient.

  2. Too lazy to read if anyone else had said this, but I think Rob is REALLY excited for some bad ass crazytown Japanese Karaoke…if any of you have been to a Japanese style karaoke joint, you know and understand the wonders that is the random background videos from the 80s. Will wonders never cease.

  3. I have to totally agree on the “toxic relationship” thing,per the new vf interview: “Pattinson, for his part, says of Stewart: “She’s influenced how I’ve done all the Twilight stuff. It’s quite nice to have someone who is genuinely indifferent to the whole spectacle of everything.” …… What more can i say!

    • exactly… why the hell would or should he be indifferent about “everything” kristen is a pill she is a teenager for criis sake and she can hardly string a sentence together she looks like hell too like she sleeps under a bridge oh yeah i forgot that is part of her image yeah she is indpependent an dnonchalant and cool god wow she is so cool…. she does not give a f%# about anything she is just a bitch and that is how cool she is !!! and well with distance and clarity maybe he can figure that out..let face it the RL rob is not exactly a man whore and kristen has a strong personality..uhmmm the punishing silent treatment types plus she hates the fangirls and the publicity why doesnt rob just get with his agent ?? i am just saying…he is always happy around her at least….what is her deal does she have a life or does she just get to follow rob around and deal with the robsten bs???

  4. My favorite letter EVER!!!

    Rob did kind of look like he had gas when he was leaving Vancouver…

    Hopefully Mr Roboto brings you back some kickin’ HK stuff in return for the awesome letter, Moon!

    (omg ever see the stuff from Japan? She wears a little Kimono! I *heart* having friends in Japan almost as much as I *heart* the HK stuff they send me from Japan!!)

  5. I new it had to be Stewie putting that frown on his face…(who can blame him when she’s just chery bowl of cherries,..NOT).
    He verfied in a vanity fair interview they were platonic friends in anycase…

    He misses TomStu.

  6. hes prob so happy because he (or whoever he borrowed that hat from) is a yankees fan and the yankees are amazing

  7. yeah kristen is toxic…he is never smiling and happy when he is around her because she is such a crass dour friggin ‘person…she is a teenager for gods sake and she cant even string a sentence she looks like she sleeps under a bridge and she does not give a
    f&%k about much of anything oh except trying to act cool and nonchalant when it comes across as bitchy and annoying..she likes that “vibe” puleeze…
    why doesnt he just get with his agent?he is always happy when she is around..iam just saying…what is her deal anyway?? does she have a life or just follow rob around and help him deal with his pain in the ass”girlfriend”

  8. I know someone mentioned it before, but indeed, Kstew is a dementor!!!! She sucks all the happiness in Rob! And whenever he’s with her, Rob looks like he’ll never be happy again! And we (collectively) are his Patronus!!!! in the form of a sparkle peen! A sparkle peen with legs! That runs like a stag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Expecto Patronum!!!!!! (points wand at the deadly mullet!!!!)

  9. i hope you can write a letter about Patty (his dog)’s passing.

  10. […] Rob in Japan and maybe also a Toxic Relationship Dear Rob, Remember when we said “if we blog it you will come?” Yea, well you were listening cause obviously […] […]

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