Posted by: Bekah | October 7, 2009

Ask WikiAnswers about Robert Pattinson

Dear Rob,

I consider myself a Rob expert. A Robexpert, if you will (not to be confused with a “sexpert” which I also am) Just like any good expert on a topic, I’ve wasted some time answering questions on the very valuable “WikiAnswers” about the topic for which I have expertise.

What does Wiki Answers have to do with YOU you wonder? What DOESN’T it have to do with you? I can ask this site any question I want about you, Rob, and it’s bound to have a brilliant answer penned by a 13 year old fan. I’ll be honest, the legitimacy of the site is skewed when anyone who calls you “Robert Cullen” is involved, so I decided to become an avid participant of the site, scouring it daily (or hourly if I’m honest) for  questions about you and adding my thoughts as WikiAnswers resident Robexpert. Here are a few examples:

(Note: These are actual questions I found followed by actual answers by WikiAnswers users. MY response is in purple below the real answer)

Seriously. Creepy. Who would HAVE this picture?

Seriously. Creepy. Who would HAVE this picture?


Q
Where can you find the pics of Robert Pattinson in his slippers getting his newspaper?

A: That’s really creepy! Why would you even want that picture? yeah thats just plain grosss. does he even get the newspaper everyday? p.s. creepy

Reply from Questioner: yes i’m that obsessed. if you don’t know where i can find those pics (and you’re pretending you’re not as obsessed as i am) then pls don’t bother answering.

Wake up early, make a pot of coffee, wait for your dad to come down the stairs in his bathrobe and sleepers, follow him out to the driveway, watch him pick up the newspaper, quickly snap a shot of him with your camera and print out the picture. Now you don’t even have to find the picture because Rob looked exactly like your dad.

Q Is Robert Pattinson hot?

A: I think he is a very attractive person. Not just on the outside but in the inside he has a beautiful heart and he deserves every comment he gets that is complementing him. He is a great person and im proud to call him a friend…for now… -posted by a very close friend-

Close friend? Sam Bradley? Is that you?

Q What is Robert Pattinson’s religion?

A: Iv’e heard from youtube hes catholic but i could be wrong but thats also a really personal question

Last time I talked to YouTube he said that Rob thinks he doesn’t have a soul and is going to end up in hell. And I agree- that is a personal question. Stick to less intrusive questions like how many times a day Rob jacks off thinking of Sam Bradley’s mom

Q Has Robert Pattinson had sex?

A: Yes but only twice:

  • with him self
  • He did with Kristen. I’ll get pics. l8r

Can I see those pictures when you’re done? Can you crop out Kristen first?

Hat says "Fan of the cyber 69" Trust

Hat says "Fan of the cyber 69" Trust

Q Does Robert Pattinson have an email adress?

A: yes he does. its robertpattison33@yahoo.com.

A: well thats a complete lie cos hes name is not pattison its robert pattinson so thats not hes email is it?????

A: actually its Rob.Pattinson_86@hotmail.com

Did he recently change it? He wrote me recently from tuckerhats69@juno.com (haha I know! Seems like a silly email name, but I sent him a white trucker hat after he asked me to cyber 69 with him last time)

Q How do you know Robert Pattinson has a girlfriend?

A: He is getting back on track with Kristen they just went on a vacation together and he spends a lot of his time at her home.

A: that Robert is dating anyone in particular, including Kristen, is just rumor. Not once have either of them stated they so much as went on a date. Same for they are married, they are engaged, they are living together, they are having sex, he got her pregnant, he got her pregnant and the studio made her get an abortion, the studio knows they are dating and tried to force them to keep it quiet, the studio knows they hate each other and if forcing them to pretend they are in love (and is actually leaking such stories to the tabloids), Robert is actually gay and Summit is making him lie, even in interviews about Little Ashes (and tried to stop him from doing that role) etc.

In the end, the answer to the question is that it is his business if he has a girlfriend and who it might be. But until he says flat out “I am dating X” anything you have heard is rumor and very possibly untrue. including the captions on fuzzy photos uploaded to the internet

OMG! YOU saw our picture!

"Kristin Stewart comes here"

"Kristin Stewart comes here"

Q Is Robert Patterson in love with kristin…. in real life. If they are in love whats the age difference?

A: I think Kristin is dating Jacob. Not for sure though just got a feeling!

Actually I have a feeling she’s effing Solomon Trimble

Q Does robert pattinson like big boobs?

A: no well he likes girls with a great personality.

Gosh I HOPE so. Otherwise this was a very expensive and very painful mistake for me to make…

But then I found THIS know-it-all:

Q Is Robert Pattinson handsome?

A: Handsome is in the eye of the beholder. To be completely honest, he is more cute than handsome. To be brutally honest, he has a more feminine look (which isn’t a bad thing, lots of girls, especially young ones like guys who look like girls…if that makes sense). So, some people may think that he is good looking (or any difinitive of that =] … see the answers below for an example, I didn’t have the heart to delete them ♥) and some people may completely disagree. And that’s fine too. If we all agreed on everything, the world would be a very boring place!

PS I ask that you please stop removing my answer to write that you think that Robert Pattinson is [insert juvenile adjective here], this is not an opinion site, and I have explained that some people find certain individuals good looking when others don’t see it. I feel that this is an unbiased answer. Please also be informed that if you removed this, I will put it back.

Who do you think you are? Roaming around the wiki answers and acting like a Robexpert? I’m pissed. Although you have a point….Wiki Answers isn’t an opinion site and you DID answer the objective question “Is Robert Pattinson Handsome” without opinion or bias. You took the simple fact that handsomeness is determined by genes and you must be up on your medical news and know that there is a slight possibility that Rob has a mutation on the ABBED section of gene #24 causing him to quite possibly be more “Cute” than “handsome” Damnit! I’ve been outdone!

Love the 2nd best Robexpert,
UnintendedChoice

Have no fear! There are UNANSWERED questions to be found on WikiAnswers! I got us started with the first two, but feel free to respond to them and the ones following in the comments. See if you can beat the 13 year olds!

Q Which is Rob Pattinson Yahoo ID?

He got rid of his Yahoo ID, but I think his ICQ number is 45637

Q What kind of phone does rob pattinson have?

The jitterbug (Don’t be confused if you see hiim with an iphone. He has one of those too but downloaded the “jitterbug” app so that it sounds and acts like a jitterbug

Q Is Robert Pattinson a racist?

Q What kind of girls does Rob Pattinson like?

Q Does Kristen Stewart eat garlic before kissing Rob to wind him up?

Then continue the fun in The Forum
and see what Moon has for us over on LTT
Don’t forget TONIGHT is the deadline to enter the “Imma” contest to win AWESOME prizes from Bella Bejeweled! Get your entries into us via e-mail or twitter by 11:59pm ET

Thank you to WikiAnswers Robert Pattinson tag for all the good times


Responses

  1. Okay, I think I need to sleep. I’ve been exhausted all day, and I need to get up early and pack all the rest of this crap I plan on hauling across the pond. I swear, I’m the worst packer ever.

    I’ll miss you! I’ll check my email and update twitter, so we can still keep in touch. And expect a postcard, lady!

    ❤ Sweet dreams.

    • Good night Jenny. Sleep well and sweet dreams.

      Safe flight. Say HI to EP. Enjoy England!!!

  2. […] Ask WikiAnswers about Robert Pattinson Dear Rob, I consider myself a Rob expert. A Robexpert, if you will (not to be confused with a “sexpert” […] […]

  3. […] (my favorite place for very accurate answers to questions. Did you see how spot on they are with questions about Rob?) And someone said it’s chorizo. HOW DO THEY KNOW THIS!? I thought we were friends, Steph. Or […]


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