Posted by: themoonisdown | September 24, 2009

Rob Pattinson answers his own mail!

Dear Me, you are awesome! Love, Me

Dear Me, you are awesome! Love, Me

Dear Rob,

This blog seems to be a bit confusing for some folks and they think YOU write Letters to Rob and YOU answer the emails, but sadly you don’t run a blog about yourself or answer that blogs email. That’d be pretty awesome if you did and way weird. BUT since it’s us reading these emails we thought it was time to jump into your mailbag and let YOU* respond to some of the very best emails we’ve received for you, recently! Ok, ok, I’ll be writing your response while you smoke a ciggie outside and yell your answer to me through the patio door. That’ll work too… so here we go….


Dear Rob,
I was in my science lesson at school and i had a piece of paper in my blazer pocket, soo i got it out and i started doodling your name all over it with love heart. Unfortunately i have a very observant science teacher so i had to go to the front of the classroom and read out what what i had been writing down. And i got a week of detentions. But i was so worth it ‘cos i love you soo much.

Love from
Naughty School Girl
London, Uk

Dear Naughty School Girl,

Are you by any chance from South Barnes and by any chance is your science teach named Mr. Sapakie? Cause that wanker made me do the same thing. You can imagine my embarrassment when I had to stand at the front of class and read Spunk Ransom loves Tom Sturridge 50 times. This is why I had to join the drama dept, they’re the only ones who understood.


PS I never ask this, but will you marry me? Oh and how old are you?

Rob empties his mailbag after the cut… won’t you join us?

Rob's dream woman

Rob's dream woman

Dear Rob,
I was inspired by your wardrobe of plaid the other day shopping. You make it look so damn sexy. I posted a pic of me on my Twitter account in my new top & a friend decided to blend You and me in our plaid shirts beside each other. Made me laugh & I hope it does the same for you!

Plaid Lover

Dear Plaid Lover-

I never say this (only to costars and about everyone I meet) but will you marry me? Plaid is my kryptonite babe and you’re making me weak. I wish there was a “Plaidboy” magazine and all it contained were pictures like yours: hot women wearing plaid and flannel. Fully covered from head to toe in plaid: plaid shirts, plaid bras, plaid underwear, plaid socks, plaid scarves, paid nikes…Oh my…. hold that thought… I’ve gotta excuse myself for minute… um… be right back.


Dearest Robert,
I know you probably get millions of emails a day saying how beautiful you are and you probably get some really random ones from freaky fans asking you to bite them.

I thought it might be a nice change to get an email asking how you are? So… How are you? lol (Laugh out loud, just in case you didn’t know! lol) My name is Girl Goes Down Under and i come from a tiny little town Down Under, you know Australia! Your a great actor and a true inspiration to the younger men watching you.

Yours faithfully,
Girl Down Under

WTF is this thing?

WTF is this thing?

Dear Girl Down Under,

WTF?! (What the F-CK, just in case you didn’t know! LOL!) OMG (Oh my god), what do u (you) think I am 100 years old and out of touch with human society?!

Well, yes probably true.

Are you single?

L8r and 143 (later and I love you just in case you didn’t know)

Dear Rob,

So the other day I was at cheer practice and the subject of Twilight came up, which of course brought up the subject of you. I wet myself smiled at the thought of you. Unfortunately, you were being discussed in quite a negative manner (i.e. that guy is so FUCKING UGLY) *gasp* Say what? I, of course, jumped to your defence, but no one listened and kept on bashing you. I seriously did almost cried.

[rant] And even though I was yelling angrily calmly explaining how amazing you were, fucking no one agreed with me; really, seriously. We were in a room full of cheerleaders and not one of them would say you were even remotely attractive! And you know what, Rob? It wasn’t cause they really thought you were ugly (well some of them probably, but not all). It’s because you’re so “in” right now, and everyone thinks you’re so hot, and they just wanted to be different and “unique” by saying the opposite. How do I know this? Well, that bitch my (ex)friend –who I know used to have x-rated dreams about you earlier in the year— just sat there nodding her lead like a fucking bobblehead doll. *nod* Robert Pattinson’s hideous. *nod* Fuck you. Was he so ugly when he was having sex knitting with you in your dreams? [/rant]

So, basically, I just about slapped my whole team, in your name.

Overprotective psycho fan

Dear Overprotective Psycho Fan,
Clearly your cheer leading team is crazy. Quit immediately or be forced into mediocrity for the rest of your life.

They probably like zac effron, right? losers.

you are where it’s at.


uhhh i mean


Get all twilosophical over at LTT
Write someone a letter in the forum!

And have you heard how Jen at MyRobertPattinson with the help of JAG at RAOR sent Rob a new Stoli shirt? No? Where have you been? Read about it here

They have a campaign to get Rob to wear the Stoli shirt to Sam Bradley’s Vancouver show Friday night. I told Jen not worry- obviously he’s going to. You know he doesn’t have any other clean clothes. Check out JAGs post here and help them by using the hashtag #NewStoliShirt on Twitter today!


  1. For the record, I totally write letters to myself on the daily telling me how awesome I am like Rob in the first picture.

    My 2nd hand embarrassment for the queen of plaid is so strong it’s bordering on 1st hand embarrassment.

    I don’t tweet but I’m sending out some wicked positive Stoli shirt thoughts!


    • Hmmmm…. is that YOU in the plaid photo, oink? Because if it is, you look suspiciously similar to Cougar Cathy…

      • I thought the SAME thing! That plaid lady looks like Cathy Cougar!

        • I think she’s WAY too young to be a cougar!

        • hey… I have red plaid jammies (wear them around the holidays).
          That pic is Catherine Hardwick isnt it? Looks like her!! I know she wears plaid too…. cougar in plaid.

      • The only plaid things I own are jammie pants. I swear!!!

        • Me too! (For Christmas only)

          • You have pyjamas specifically for Christmas?

          • I thought eveyone had Christmas jammies. Mine are plaid too!

        • From the responses below.. looks like Sears had a sale a few years back on plaid christmas jammies.
          I betcha or Target, or Walmart, or Kmart or one of the marts. ..

    • Are you 2nd hand embarrassed that I totes took a thumbs-up pic with my blue flannel shirt when I was out and about this weekend?

      • No…I can see this being adorable from you. Scary from the lady in red.

        And can I see it?

      • read ya—:-(

    • oh i thought it was super cute!!

      • It could be cute if she like kept it to herself for s’s & g’s. But her “friend” blended her and Rob together? Sure, sure.

  2. Her name is really Girl Goes Down Under, or was she just telling Rob what she will do for him?

    • I was wondering the exact same thing!

    • I was wondering that as well… I had to read her name a few times… thinking she had a great idea, getting all of the “convorsation” out of the way. Tell him EXACTLY what you want, honey!

      Holy hell. Maybe that’s not a commonly used phrase in Australia? I hope?

      • It is totally a commonly used phrase in Australia. I actually kind of hoped Moon made it up to cover the weirdo’s real name, simply because I am now 1st hand embarrassed on behalf of my whole country with regards to “Girl Goes Down Under”.
        The only non-adult use of “Down Under” Australian’s talk about is Men At Work. Because they are ’80s gold. Otherwise, it’s all that’s what she said jokes.

    • @ JodieO..
      My dear woman.. what a naughty mind you have (i.e. Girl goes down under) INDEED)
      ha ha.
      (Rob would ❤ that).

  3. Just a little note: while being from Australia, we are not all nuts like “Girl Down Under”.
    And as far as I know, no-one calls us “Down Under” except for tourists.

    • I thought all Aussies were certifiable?
      Your saying their all not batshite crazy?

      • We are all batshite crazy, but in a good way.

        We like to sing Down Under in karaoke bars in foreign countries. Or at least I do. I may or may not be indicative of other Australians though.

        • you all sound more like Texans to me..
          party animals.

  4. Rob would totally sh*t his pants if there were plaid Nikes… someone should get on that. Hear that Nike???

    • My daughter had plaid Nike’s at one point.

      But she is 4. So don’t think they would fit him.

      Nice thought, though.

    • Um…

      • You sooo know Rob would love a pair of these…..

        • I would love a pair of these.

      • LMAO that’s awesome, forget the Stoli shirt, someone should send him a pair of these!!

  5. UC & Moon, I’m so jealous of you right now, you have no idea.

    I’m tempted to make a fake Rob twitter account and give out a fake e-mail address so that I could get gems like these on a daily basis. So far I get my daily Karen (Will&Grace) and daily Chuck Norris facts. And now I’m thinking ol’ Chuck has some competition.

    The plaid chick has a Cougar Cathy vibe to her. And the cheerleader is on a mission for sure. But the Down Under gal is my fave. You schooled her alright.
    *laughing out loud*

    p.s. Rob soooo has “Will you marry me?” in his e-mail signature.

  6. I work at a lingerie shop and we actually sell plaid (the pattern not the actual material) bras and undies… and i may just own some plaid undies ahahahahaa :S

    • You should send Rob a pair of plaid boxers for this birthday. Maybe he’ll ask you to marry him. Oh wait…

      • Or send him your plaid undies. FOR SURE he’ll ask you to marry him then!

  7. Oh for the love of-!

    You had me at “Plaidboy” 😉

    And for these ladies that are writing to LTR, or rather to Rob, please see the written example below:

    Dear Rob,

    I wanna do you.


    See. It’s simple, sweet, and to the point. Now excuse me. I seem to be missing one of my plaid Nike sneaks and I’m going to be late for work.

    • Best to just cut to the chase. x

  8. It’s about time someone started slapping the truth into people. Yelling is so 2008. I want overprotective psycho fan in my team. I have good beer, a good bite and strong nails, please pick me!

    Moon, I was searching for the ‘*’ below, for an explanation of ‘YOU*’ (since I am probably the one person who needs the explanations and actually reads them). Does this mean there is nothing to explain and Rob did yell those answers to you? Expect my letter.

  9. Spunk Ransom <3's Tom Sturridge = the centerfold of Plaidgirl magazine


    You ladies are geniuses.

    • I’d buy that.

    • @ HeyyBrother;
      re: “Spunk Ransom <3's Tom Sturridge = the centerfold of Plaidgirl magazine"

      The image is beyond funny!

      We should give out a badge for being indoctrinated in The Order of the Plaid.
      Our cry would be: "Long live the Bromance!"


  10. Wow.

    Do they make plaid straightjackets? Cause I am afraid that those will need to be in fashion before long.

    I love mailbag day!!!

  11. “true inspiration to the younger men watching you.”

    Is TomStu younger than Rob??

    • @ Kaite S.

      Believe it or not.. TOM STU.. is about one year older than Robbie!
      True! -TomStu looks younger, but my little cupcake is actually older. (le sigh).

      I loves me some TomStu !


  12. That is totally Cougar Cathy in the plaid. She wrote a letter to Rob because she thinks she’s being subtle and stealthy. Much like she thought she was being subtle and stealth in the commentary…

    “Oh yeah, Rob… you did have big pecs for a few days…” *bites lip*

    Yeah Cathy, super stealth.

    • Haha! It wasn’t until I watched Twilight with the commentary that I realised the whole film was essentially a filmic shrine to Rob by The Couger.

  13. PlaidBoy = WIN!!!

    Will you marry me Moon?

  14. Awesome! (that’s old chick talk for amazing.)

    Miss everyone!!! RL (Real Life… 😉 ) Has been vying for all my attn. lately. Still read everyday.

    Loves to All! (special fake lez hugs to UC and Moon.)


    • Hey, P3! Good to see you here – we’ve missed you and your witty comments!

      • Thx babe! Been reading everyday, but have had little time to comment regularly as of late. It felt like I was missing my family…weird? Normal.

        • Hey girl, I read everyday too, but I don’t often get a chance to write either…I miss this fam too…totes normal….here’s a big hug coming your way!
          oooooooooooo and 1 kiss x.

          • Thx BB… x

  15. Rob I have an extremely tight plaid vest (from Charlotte Russe), will you marry me? Pretty please?:-)

    My hubby got it for me, like you, he just loves plaid. Pfft.

  16. You mad these up, right?

    Except the cheerleader one, that was me.


    • …and by mad I meant ‘made’.

      More coffee, please.

    • You know, I thought it sounded like you. Weird? 😉

  17. The amount of second-hand embarrassment that I’m feeling at this moment tops the shame I feel whenever Rob does something “spontaneous” (like, call himself Spunk Ransom, talk about his feces… Oh, and ask complete strangers to marry him). These poor, poor girls! Hence, why I’d never do anything “crazy” like write a letter to Rob *cough* again *cough*

    …. What?

    • P.S. Also wanted to thank you for using the still from Haunted Airman! That movie is TRIPPY! It definitely ties in well with us crazies… I mean, THE crazies. ‘Cause we’re not… Crazy I mean. Okay, I’ll stop typing.

  18. as Rob would (did) say: “good cheap fun”—love it but feel sorry for all those girls out shopping for their trousseaus (sp? looks so wrong)—Moon, you should play interlocutor for Rob more often—you seem to have an ‘in’—:-)(-:

  19. Drama Geeks Rule! Also people in plaid. That is all.

  20. Screw “Plaidboy” and bring on the “Plaidgirl”! Thud..

    How is it possible that NO ONE has said YES to Rob’s proposals? He’s obviously asking the wrong girl (jumping up and down and waving….)

  21. Thank you so much for the laughs!!!!! I so needed it… Some complications in RL (real life in case you didn’t know :D)… so your blogs are totally keeping me sane (ok, I’m crazy but in a good way 😉 )
    Thank you,

    • of course I meant *hugs*… so many complications going on that I cannot even spell … ugh!

      • You could have meant Hugh Jackmans…those are just as good as hugs.

        • 😀 i know! :D… when i read the post again, and the *hughs* I thought about HJ right away, too :D… and you are absolutely right, they are as good (in not even better 😉 ) as hugs 😀

          • Cullen smile at Hugh J. in plaid.

  22. That last letter was intense…
    “I wet myself at the thought of you”
    WHOAAA… like peed yourself? like pissed in your pants? cause that’s disturbing. or are we talking a different kind of wet here?

    Overprotective Psycho Fan.. you are.. for lack of a better word.. scary

  23. “I thought it might be a nice change to get an email asking how you are? So… How are you?”

    This has me ROTFLMAO!

    • OKKKEEEE! I just have an old lady question. Could Rob, or Girl Down Under please tell me what the ROTFLMAO means? I mean, I get lmao, I get flmao. I guess I am missing the rest of it. And Rob and GDU (girl down under) seem to have a good understanding of this sort of thing. Thanks


      • Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Ass Off

        It’s the highest step on the ‘laughing’ abbreviations ladder:


        geez, am I geek much? watch out, or I’ll break out in 1337 sP3@k

  24. Q:) Ummm I never ask this, but will you marry me??? lmfao, REALLY?!?

    A.) HELLA YA!!!! really. I. will.

  25. Did you make up 143?? I’ve never heard of that. If you didn’t make that up, that is ridiculous. But I’m going to use it all the time.

    • 143 has been around 4ever. and the crazy cheerleader was my favorite! lmao

      • The cheerleader is my favorite too. She stole my line about Rob knitting. The other time I posted was when there was a debate about if Rob went out with girls. I was like, “well he’s not sitting at home knitting”. LOL

        • Wait, did I start a trend??? Rob “knitting”=no sexy time. I’m happy that I can influence the minds of the youth of America. LOL *evil genius rubs hands together with lips curling up into a smirk thinking of items for further domination*

    • I’m so glad u asked that. I’m wondering too!

    • I don’t get it :(. Yes I’m blonde.

      • haha. Nah, Alice. Don’t worry, it’s a weird concept. Each of the numbers rep how many letters are in the word; there’s one letter in “I”, four letters in “love” and three in “you”. Not exactly straight forward :S

  26. […] Rob Pattinson answers his own mail! « Letters to Rob – view page – cached This blog seems to be a bit confusing for some folks and they think YOU write Letters to Rob and YOU answer the emails, but sadly you don’t run a blog about yourself or answer that blogs email. That’d be pretty awesome if you did and way weird. BUT since it’s us reading these emails we thought it was time to jump into your mailbag and let YOU* respond to some of the very best emails we’ve received for you, recently! Ok, ok, I’ll be writing your response while you smoke a ciggie outside and yell your answer to me through the patio door. That’ll work too… so here we go…. — From the page […]

  27. Nope, it’s been around for a while.

  28. I beat all of you out…

    Robbie, come on down and lets roll around in them and you can indoctrinate me in the Order of the Plaid.

    I’ll also have a chilled bottle of Stoli’s and a Heniken by the bed side as well. Cuz drunk Rob IS the best Rob (to quote JaneT).

    ps. throwing Moon & UC some love for this blog/subject. ❤ funny as always.

    • LMAO!

  29. “Plaid is my kryptonite babe and you’re making me weak”
    Thanks for my daily guffaw!

  30. I love crazy cheerlerler’s! (yes this is spelled wrong, because my kids pronounce it this way) anywhoo, I love you. oh, and will you marry me?

  31. So… I’m overprotective psycho fan… really, seriously. And that was a joke. I mean, it happened and all, but it was exaggerated, and I didn’t think I was writing a letter to the real Rob or anything.

    I think I will crawl into a hole now…

    P.S. The did was supposed to be crossed out.

  32. girls,did you see the latest post on Perez?
    wow. I saw this one coming.

  33. […] Rob Pattinson answers his own mail! Dear Rob, This blog seems to be a bit confusing for some folks and they think YOU write Letters to Rob and YOU answer […] […]

  34. Dear Rob,

    Lately I’ve been calling you “The Ovary Whisperer.” Is that normal?


  35. I’d accuse you of making these up, Moonster, but they’re just sooooo….


    I got nothing.

    But we know where it’s at. And it’s not Gayfron.

  36. LTR….143!

  37. LOTN???

    • Well, no one seems to be on. I’ll check back in a little while just in case…

      Miss you guys hardcore!!!

      • Hi FN. I was a little late checking tonight. I’m out here. I’ve missed you a lot!

  38. *brushes off the red dirt*, hiya ladies

    can i just say work has been kicking my bum this week?

    All well i hope?

    • Rolling in the dirt at lunch time again, Lizzie?

      All is okay, on this end. Can’t wait for the weekend though. How about with you, aside from an ass kicking?

      • No we had the armaggeddon of dust storms on thursday, seriously it was a red out I have never seen anything like it, we all awoke to blood red skies and lasted till lunch time, now Syndey is completely coated in fine red dust, unbelievable, can’t believe there is any red dust left in the outback!

        Just a few plans for the weekend nothing major just catching up with friends that sort of deal and you?

        • Wow, really?! I hate wind storms, the dirt and sand and dust is terrible when it gets in your eyes. It sounds like the sky looked cool though… but scary.

          Yeah same here, a friend is coming to visit for the weekend and I have to rehearse a bunch of crap for my classes. Oh, and I guess one of my friends is having a b-day party on Saturday.

  39. EyeC, we can’t really talk about it here… but when you get around to it you should email me your thoughts on the most recent EmPr update. Because… wow.

    Also, throw in CWAIA update thoughts while you’re at it too. 😉

    By the way, how are you?

    • Yeah! Don’t talk about it here, because some people (who shall remain nameless haven’t been able to read the updates as fast as others! lol)

      • You’re gonna love ’em!

        • I have no doubts. I wish HL5 would update! Not that I’d read it right away. Well, maybe I’d make an exception…lol

    • Double WOW Em Pr – I loved it, in fact I almost cryu and I don’t ever cry, and also CW&IA, seriously how good were those updates this week?

      • SSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! And why were you covered in red dirt??? Is that a kinky FF thing?? lol

        • Don’t you girls watch the news??? Lizzie’s Sydney just went through the biggest dust storm in 70 years!

          • Nope, no news here. I did, however, watch part of The Office on TBS the other day. lol

          • No, I don’t watch the news, but she just mentioned it! So crazy!

        • see above to J-m on the red dirt, but now that I think about it I think that is the only situation i haven’t come across in ff…yet…i give it a week.

          • LOL! You’re so right! I’m surprised no one’s worked that whole Kanye fisasco into some FF. lol

      • I know!!! It was an amazing chapter, that’s for damn sure.

        AND FOR REAL, those CWAIA were the smut I needed! Especially since The Office update lacked any smut… which was weird. But the update had essential story line stuff, so I still really enjoyed that one too.

        • ‘Tis true. Good smut! Such a sweet Edward in EmPr. And good replay from EPOV in CW. THAT’S and Edward I wouldn’t mind meeting behind a dumpster!

          • Um, I second that. Tattward is delicious.

    • Wow, I’ve been checking back over and over again. Looks like FN went on to bed.

      Yeah, Lizzie, that red dirt is something! Glad to hear you survived it.

      Jenny, yes we will talk about that last EmPr! Whew! I’ll be emailing you as soon as I get back to EP in London. I owe her!

      • I’m HERE! I’m HERE!!! Can’t you see me??? lol

        • we can but we need to send you on a speed reading course asap!

          • If only had more time (and desire) to learn…lol

  40. Hey gals!

    • Well, well! Glad you’re still alive down there in SA!

      • Me too EyeC, me too. How are you doing? Getting a lot of jewelry made with all your spare time?? lol

        • You are a joker! I just finished day 10 of this 10 day cold and I’m almost human again!

          • That’s good! I’m glad you’re finally feeling better!

  41. Okay ladies, I have to get to bed b/c I have an early class tomorrow. 😦 It was good chatting with y’all for a little bit. I’m glad you’re all doing well. I’ll try to get on this weekend. We’ll see though…<3 you all! NIGHT! and Sweet Rob (or Bobby) dreams!

    • Glad I didn’t blink! Have a good night FN.

    • sorry this pesky work is totally interupting my LTR time today – not happy!
      Night FN, hope to catch you over the weekend

  42. I hate to chat and run, but I should sleep as well. I’ve been utterly exhausted all week. This new schedule is more energy demanding than I originally thought! Uggghh.

    ❤ you guys.

    Sweet Rob dreams! Stay away from Bobby. 😉 Hope to talk to you guys this weekend!

    • Night Jenny. Sleep well.

    • you too J-m although you can still totally keep Bobby.

      • I agree L but if you saw Bobby in person he’s quite delish!

  43. Sorry E, it appears to be a bit of a hit adn run today, and we aren’t deserting you really, just my friday pm hasn’t quite panned out how i anticipated it would (ie playing on LTR!)

    Should be around tomorrow so will play propoerly then, go get some sleep so you kick that cold.


    • Have a good weekend Lizzie! I’ll be fine. TTYL.

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