Robert Pattinson: What will he do in VanCity?

Where's Robldo

Dear Rob,

I miss you. Is that creepy & stalkerish? Yes? But it’s true. I had the worst Monday in the history of Mondays and usually I can count on a hot picture of you to surface to give me some reason for living.

I blame Summit. Mostly because it’s just fun to blame Summit for stuff, but also because they cast you in Remember Me where you were stalked on set all summer long which wore me out and actually made me immune to the power of your hottness on camera. So for the past few weeks I’ve been like “Meh- Rob looks hot again” and it’s done nothing for me. Hasn’t made me short of breath, hasn’t made me clutch my Edward Action figure while I fall asleep, hasn’t made me suddenly think about trash day and large trash receptacles… life has sucked (it got so bad that I even considered buying that hot shirtless Jacob action figure just to switch it up).  I took this summer for granted. But now… now that I don’t have you? Well, you’re like a drug to me….. Yeah, I said that. My Monday really was that bad that I just said a Twilight quote.

Where are you? VanCity? In transit? I can’t believe the summer has flown by and you’re back to filming the Twilight Saga: Eclipse. What are you most looking forward to being back in Canada? A pick-up game of hockey with Taylor, Kellan & Big Daddy Lautner? Are you going to try to sweet talk Bryce Dallas Howard into letting you call her Rachelle (or Rachael) just because it’ll be easier than trying to remember which one of her first names is her real first name? How about rekindling the drama between Nikki & Kristen? I bet it was fun when two hot young chicks were fighting over you (sadly, you don’t think it’s as hot when two older chicks (not too much older- just old enough to know enough ifyouknowwhati’msaying) like Moon & I fight over you) Will you be seeing if you can start dating rumors with all the rest of the girls in the cast? Or will you take on a real challenge and see if the tabloids catch you holding Justin Chong’s hand under the table when you’re out to sushi one night? So much to do… so little time.

Just be sure to save some time to study your Eclipse lines! That book was my favorite- Edward is kinda perfect in it- and so you gotta deliver okay? I’ve even done some of the hard work for you- I commissioned Zephyersky to come up with some RobPorn based on quotes from Eclipse. All you have to do is look at these pictures, practice the lines & make the same exact facial expressions. I promise there won’t be a dry seat eye in the movie theater if you listen to me!

Practice makes perfect!
UnintendedChoice

See more RobPorn here

Let me tell you a little story about our Rob Porn (click that if you don’t know what we’re talking about- it’s G rated, promise) from today. I emailed my Rob Porn enabler- Zephyersky– and asked for just one little “Eclipse” related RobPorn- and what does she deliver? 14 of them- thus changing my ENTIRE post and making me a very happy little UC.  THANKS Zephyersky. You are the best ever. And go check out the FanFic she’s writing! (It’s my fault she didn’t get the new chapter posted- whoops!) (Yes.. you’ll see the rest of the delicious pics she whipped up soon!)

Play on LTT

Find new pals on The Forum (psst- Geeky Cousin says there may be some downtime today- don’t fret… if it goes down, it’ll be back!)