FACTs about Robert Pattinson at Comic-Con

FACT: You wanna bang me. Don't deny it

Dear Rob,

I love FACTs. In FACT, I say FACT quite often before I declare something. Like FACT: I ate too much sushi last night and I’m really regretting it this morning. And FACT: I really really hate Moon for getting to see you yesterday when I was stuck at work.

I cannot take credit for the brilliancy of the FACT declaration. No, no, no. For that, all credit goes to Dwight Schrute. Yes, the character on the US version of The Office (mind out of the gutter FanFic readers) Google him if you’re unfamiliar- he’s hilarious!

So yesterday during the Comic-Con insanity (where I did nothing but worry about Moon, sit & stew in my jealousy of Moon and do NO work) I started jotting down a list of FACTs about you that I realized during Comic-Con:

FACT: Just like it used to happen when the Beatles came to town, girls have orgasms at the mere sight of you

FACT: THE Pattinson Pants lady was at Comic-Con doing her best to scare the shit out of you with her pants, plastered with your face (Don’t worry- Moon has the picture proof to share with us soon! Fingers crossed she partied with her last night and scored us an exclusive LTR interview we’ll call: “Why the eff do you wear those pants?”)

FACT: Instead of asking you a question at the New Moon panel, a girl started to SING to you. She is our 2nd-hand embarrassment mascot  (I would PAY someone to find this clip for me on video- Seriously, I’d pay you a whole $1.00- UPDATE: Commenter Ljs found this vid for us, which might be what Moon told me about, but we’ll have to wait until she gets her ass out of bed to confirm it. Singing at 3:28)

FACT: Only one of you is legal. Therefore he wins

FACT: You looked so flippin’ hot in your new plaid shirt. Thank goodness the Gap was open at JFK airport when you were waiting for your plane!

FACT: You are legal thankfully, unlike your mildly attractive counterpart

FACT: Taylor is still illegal

FACT: Kristen should have worn a ponytail (Oh, is this supposed to be about you, Rob? Whoops. It had to be said)

FACT: It’s a sad day when you, dirty British boy, hobo-look lovin’ Robert Pattinson, look fresh n’ clean compared to a girl

FACT: Your hair did a little curly thing all day long which is odd because San Diego has the least humidity of like, anywhere in the US. Aw- curly hair Rob *Swoon*

If vid does not work, clicky here

FACT: You sound very British in this video when you say “saw” like “Saw-er” at 1:49

FACT: You are kinda a wuss and let Kristen walk all over you and interrupt you (at 2:00, 3:35 and 4:22) but then grow a pair and call her out when you yell “Shut up!”

FACT: If you and Kristen are actually hooking up, I think it might be incestuous, because by the way you act in this video, you seem more like brother & sister than lovers.

That’s all! Just a few FACTs I noticed during all this Comic-Con brouhaha

Love,
UnintendedChoice

What was your favorite Robic-Con moment? (update: in the form of a FACT please-  make Dwight proud)

FACT: I just got a text from Moon at 12:45 am ET that says “We’re at the same bar/restaurant as them” THAT’s IT!? I’m going to BED not knowing who “them” is!? And if you mean……. ROB!? F-you, Moon. Doing that to your dear pal UC right before bed! Guess I’ll read about it with you all on Moon’s tell all on LTT today (she also promises an LTR ‘tell all memoir- Rob @ Comic-Con’ soon!

FACT: The Forum is a fun place to play

FACT: All the pics came from SocialiteLife (and yes, I forgot to add this credit when I posted this last night and I woke up at 6 am thinking “Shit! I didn’t credit my pictures!” FACT: I need to get a life

I would have died without Brookies help tonight. Thanks love xoxo