Posted by: UC | December 2, 2009

Rob’s mailbag: overflowing with love and stuff

Dear Rob,

We’re really behind on emails. Like really really behind. You should probably spank me Uh, anyway, I thought we’d catch up and clear out our inbox with a few letters from YOUR mailbag, sprinkled in with some of your new Vanity Fair pictures. (Yes, new pictures again. Vanity Fair just gives and gives and gives- just like me.) Love, UC

A Medical Justification

What age lines?

Dear Rob,

I’ve been studying recent HQ pics of your latest pictures and noticed smile lines not usually associated with someone your age. As a non-medical professional, I’d like to tell you about the difference between biological age and chronological age.

Although you are 23 years old biologically, you drink beer like it’s water, smoke like a chimney, eat Hot Pockets and Twix for nourishment. You lock yourself in hotel rooms reading books that appeal to tenured philosophy professors. Your chronological age, therefore, makes you easily in your late 30s. Let’s just say 37, hypothetically speaking.

Although I am in my late 30s biologically, I do not drink (a lot), smoke , or eat microwaved processed foods and candy bars for my main sustenance. I also spend time with two small children on a regular basis. Therefore, according to medical experts, this makes me well in my early 20s. Let’s just say 23, chronologically speaking.

I am confident that even you would give our relationship your Ashton-Demi stamp of approval now that you know this clear distinction.

Not 17 for a long time now but close,
A non-medical professional

How my mother became aware of your hotness (Part 1)

Put this on your magnet

Dear Rob,

I wanted to share with you the story of how my mother became aware of your hotness and her reaction to it. I think you will enjoy it. It happened when she came home from work today, and I’d just received my newly purchased Robert Pattinson refrigerator magnet. This is how it went down.

Bianca: “I got a package from ebay today.”
the Mother: “Containing what?”
Bianca: “Look at the fridge.”
the Mother looks at the refrigerator.
the Mother: “I’m not having this on my refrigerator.”
Bianca: “Why not?”
the Mother: “I’m just not”.
Bianca: “Don’t be selfish!”
the Mother: “Who is he anyway?”
Bianca: “Robert Pattinson.”
the Mother: “I’m still not having it on my refrigerator door.”
Bianca: “Why the hell not?! He is effing gorgeous! He looks just like James Dean in that picture.”
the Mother: “He’s smoking!”
Bianca: “So what?”
the Mother: “I’M NOT HAVING THIS MAN ON MY REFRIGERATOR!”
Bianca: “What exactly irritates you about this refrigerator magnet?”
the Mother: “Well.. err.. I don’t know..I don’t know anything about this man.. I’m married to your father!”
Bianca: “I am aware of that.”
the Mother: “Yes, so I should have a magnet of your father on the refrigerator instead.”

the Father enters the kitchen.

the Father: “Who is that guy? He looks like James Dean.”
Bianca: “That is Robert Pattinson, and your wife finds him terribly attractive, but she’s too embarrassed to admit it.”
the Father: “Ha, I don’t blame her!”

the Mother blushes deeply and stomps angrily from the room.

- Bianca

Peek in Rob’s mailbag a bit more after the jump!

Not under the New Moon effect

I was seriously not impressed. I'm serious.

Dear Rob,

I know this holiday is supposed to be about feeling grateful for what we have, what we see, for you, for the Vanity Fair photoshoot and so many other things that probably will make this letter too long to handle. But right now I gotta say I’m thankful for all the time you were outside the screen on New Moon ´cause it saved you from all these ridiculous dialogues and the cheesy scenes in that movie.  Believe me, that’s not an easy thing to say ‘cause I really wanted to see Edward (you) in this movie and before going to watch NW, I was really hopeful after reading the comments that made it a “better” movie than Twilight.

Besides some nice shirtless scenes from the wolfpack and, obviously, your counted appearances, the whole movie was pretty much a bad copy of the book and it seemed to be made from essay footage where the cast -some of them- tried to hold the laughs.

So, after all, it is ok that you were outside the screen on New Moon and I know –hope- that things will be different –better- with Eclipse,
Notunderthenewmooneffect

A Turkey-Day Prank

Just Rob. In his Turkey-Day best

Dear Rob,

This thanksgiving was spectacular! It was full of food, friends, family, more food, and it even included you. Not literally you. . . . I wish. Here’s how “you” were involved:

So I’m sitting at the little bar my relatives randomly have in their living room, when my not so sober uncle comes over and plops down next to me. He asks me if I have a boyfriend and I was going to answer truthfully (single and ready to mingle) but for some reason my mouth exploded and your name came out instead. My uncle accepted it without blinking an eye, having never read twilight or watched it before, aka he lives under a rock. He asked me a bunch of questions like where you’re from, where you are right now.He asked me your age and keeping up with the Rob-honesty I replied, “23.” Now that freaked my uncle out. How could a 23 year old British-born actor be dating his precious young niece? He speculated that you would be unfaithful to me with that Kristen girl your spending thanksgiving with, or your cougar agent Stephanie ritz. I assured him though that you were loyal, kind, had a weird sense of humor, and even bathed twice a month. Through out this whole conversation it was extremely hard (that’s what she said) for both my cousin and I, to not burst out in laughter. Long story short I told my uncle it wasn’t real later in the evening but only after he was finished sending a heartfelt “take care of my niece” text to my british boyfriend. (all i did was edit my best friends name in the contact info to Rob Pattinson) So Rob how low have i stooped that I would take my imaginary relationship with you this far? Although it was extremely funny and kinda thrilling to have you as my pseudo boyfriend for a few hours, i think i may have taken a few steps over the “that’s normal” line.

Hope you enjoyed you turkey day as much as I did,
Kaymac

Have YOU written Rob a letter? We love getting them and posting the best (even though it takes us FOREVER to respond!) Email your letters to us!

Thanks to Vanity Fair cuz… phew! Keep ‘em coming. And To MyRobPattinson for the heads up (aka frantic text!)

Our internet game is ridiculous: The Forum, LTT, Twitter

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Responses

  1. Kaymac, your letter is hilarious! My daydreams exactly, but acted out. Brilliant!

    And Bianca, you have one cool father. Hope your mother comes out of the closet in part 2!

  2. I must agree with letter #1. Despite being in my mid-thirties, I often feel that I look younger than Rob. Therefore, no one would stare if we went out together. Are you listening Rob? (Also, I don’t have a mullet – just so you know. But maybe you’re into that sort of thing.)

    As for Letter #3 – although Rob was only in 1/3 of the NM movie, he supplied some of the most cheestastic lines in the whole show. “You’re my only reason to stay alive . . . if that’s what I am. (I cringed. Sorry Rob. It’s not your fault. Damn screenwriter!!)

  3. Bianca, I LOVE your letter. Hilarious.
    My mother also tries to deny she’s attracted to Rob, but it’s just to piss me off.

  4. Hilarious! These girls rock!:-)

    To the non-medical-professionel:

    You simply made my day….FINALLY someone has found a reason for my Robsession…
    He is OLDER than ME! So easy…I am kinda overwhelmed of this sensational discovery…WOW!

    To Bianca:

    After that dialogue your father HAS to be with his own magnet on the refrigerator…

    To Notunderthenewmooneffect

    Rob is PROUD of that movie, he even appreciated his body (ME too, Me too…and surely not alone in the movie… )…so for me it’s difficult to critize it…after all yesterday I saw it the first time in english and not getting ALL the dialogues was a benefit to the film…lol…and….
    Rob..YOU WERE GREAT, Be proud of that!

    To Kaymac
    great story but reading your letter was kinda complicated because I COUDN’T concentrate with THAT “outtake”….!!!SWOON!

    To Rob
    please say thanks to UC and Moon doing ALL the work for you!

    I saw a pic today from yesterday…you looked like a someone who has come out of jail….hehe…you are really enjoying your free time by simply doing nothing (shaving, eating (didn’t like that TH.G.stuff at the Kstew house?), having regular showers)???
    Love you still
    Me

    • Here you are…lol

      http://i581.photobucket.com/albums/ss259/RobsessedBLOG/Dec%201st%202009%20Los%20Angeles/RobertPattinsonwithValet.jpg

      • Oops he did it again! :-)

        You’re funny…you said he looks like he just got out of jail! :-)

        Since he’s in LA, that’s where we should be right now robgirl! I can’t wait for him to go to Budapest!

        • Yeah..but I can’t see Budapest-Bel-Ami-gaining-weight-Rob!
          Hey Rob, put some food into your gorgeous cheeks (the ones in face..lol),…..

          Bel Ami wasn’ t a HOBOLICIOUS skinny guy!(..if I read the book correctly!)

          • Oh really? Maybe he’s preparing for that? I’ve never read the book, you think I should?

          • YES, lots of s*x!

          • Lots of s*x in the book? Well then, I think I’m gonna enjoy watching Rob in the movie. Oops did I just say that. I hope Rob or Kristen’s not lurking today! lol

          • I read they didn’t determened the city. And am so hoping it’ll be Paris. I mean the shizz about Paris it’s too expensive, c’mon you hire huge Holywood stars (the movie will SELL even if the only famous actor is Rob) but the guy continues to hire huge stars and then they think Paris is an expensive location? I’m dreaming (fr expression read helloooo!).

          • Budapest..Paris…who cares…it’s Europe!
            Yes…Paris IS expensive, especially Lafayette!

          • I CARE! For the movie’s credibility and quality…and daily stalking for months!!!!!!
            Seriously I didn’t think it would be this huge Hollywood movie, I like it when they cast more anonymous actresses when the movie’s commercial succes is guranteed by a huge name. And I love the 2 Emmas, but it’s not the point.
            I also thing it’s scandalous for a huge movie like NM not to pay the extras with all the money they get.

            As for Bel-Ami I strongly feel they should hire…me!!! Everything will seem so real, won’t have to fake anything! :)

      • Did Rob borrow the torn blue shirt from New Moon and just patch it up?

        • …borrow…LMAO!

      • Wow, hairy little bugger, isn’t he?
        And hot, sexy, funny….
        sigh

  5. Dear Bianca:
    Your father deserves a magnet after that!

    And dear Kaymac:
    BWUUAAHHAHAHHAHAHAH amazingly funny!

  6. Always remember everything goes south. It is called gravity. We all have it . we all get it. It is called old age. Like my good Jessie Duplantis says take a picture of him or her when they are young. All that stuff is going south. Please Rob Pattison compared to James Dean. Get real. Dean was a trained actor-The Actors Studio. Dean had a very short career but he was great. Giant, and Rebel without a cause, East of Eden. http://bobbygee.wordpress.com/

    • Rob has been trained as well. It isn’t like he is some random hot ass bum off the street that the Coug saw sitting on the bench outside of her favorite TGIFridays waiting for a bus. Dude has skills.

    • You know as much about Rob as the man in the moon! Thanks dictionary!
      Blablabla!

    • Wait Bobbygee….you know who Jesse Duplantis is???????????????!!!!!!!!! OMG.

    • Bobbygee with the smackdown!!!!!

  7. Loved the non-medical professional’s perspective. This makes me feel slightly less creepy about my crush.

    Kaymac’s letter killed me! ?Totally brills!

    Dear Rob,
    After viewing Robgirl’s link of that pic of you with Mujibar, I’ve decided a food intervention is in order. Did Mama Stew not cook a turkey? Were you forced to wing it with another Twix? Can’t go through the drive-thru at In-n-Out without the paps? I would totally feed you. You know, food and stuff.

    Love,
    T

    • Ditto on the food intervention. I’ve been saying this for months now. :-(

  8. I smoke and drink and eat junk food and then try to repair things with running, moisturizers and sex. But here the doctors have a different speech focused on pleasure, listening to one’s needs and not frustrating oneself. So I guess I’m just following the medical advice.

    Dear Rob,
    Speaking of needs, could you please do an effort for my (mental) health?
    I also appreciate your looking older even if I’m sure in reality the gap between last year and now it’s not sooo huge as it seems. Cause last year they plucked your eyebrows, made you shave ….and you ended up looking like a gay teen. And now that you can do whatever you want (would you like to do me?) you choose to get away from the teeny image and be seen as a serious (HAWWT) actor.

    • Hahaha…
      I don’t believe you..of the eating…you look soooo in top shape…with that banana…
      Of Rob…, I guess you prefer the french style….lol
      I like him in EVERY way….
      Hugs

      • hahaha
        I think there’s a mistake in your msg, a capital letter. Did you mean “with that banana of Rob”? Yes, I am that lame.Lame lame.

    • “try to repair things with running, moisturizers and sex.” Is it working? LOL.

      • Yes..it works,
        but you have to follow eactly THAT chronological order,
        right ? minuit passe’?

        • Well okay I do all those things and I don’t smoke or drink. So this better make me look 20 at 50!

          • SB
            Can’t gurantee the results without the smoking and drinking. Never tested. lol

          • Minuit passe -perhaps I should take up smoking and drinking?

            I emailed you last night, did it go through? It came back the first time, then I resent it.

        • hahaha
          Exactly. And if you fallow strictly the prescription, it’s highly recommended to insert the showering routine after the running. And that’s where my life hygiene and Rob’s may differ.

          • He doesn’t care…at all…!!! lol

    • By: minuit passé on December 2, 2009
      at 9:14 am: I smoke and drink and eat junk food and then try to repair things with running, moisturizers and sex.

      In that order?

      • Robgirl, southernbelle and absolutelyvlc,
        I confirm that this is the exact chronological order :) I copied it from the doctor’s prescription.

        • I knew it, I am your german twin!

          • I’m really starting to think so.

  9. Totally agree with number 1. They’d better get moving with BD, otherwise they’re going to have to change the storyline so that Edward mysteriously ages to about 40 (human years).He looks so much older than he did in Twilight-maybe it’s just the tweed, I don’t know. And I drink very moderately, don’t smoke, exercise and am a vegetarian, so chronologically if we dated Chris Hansen might be coming after YOU, Rob. Ok, not really. But close.

    I have to disagree with number 3, though. New Moon is an amazing movie on its own, but it leaves Twilight in the dust. I saw it for the third time last night, and noriced a few things I had previously overlooked:

    1. Why is Jacob doing a bad John Wayne imitation when he’s talking to Bella in the rain? His delivery is so stilted and weird it makes me squirm. “I’m not good, Bella-I used to be a good kid, but not anymore.” It almost sounds like bad dubbing.

    2. In the same scene, is Bella wearing a pair of shiteous black Nikes? Kinda looks like it.

    3. I’m sure most people noticed this right off, but Bella and Alice fly Virgin Airlines to Italy. Was there ever a more perfect product placement?

    The one that IS terrible in NM is Jasper’s wig. I found myself apologizing for it to my friend, who was seeing the movie for the first time.They should digitally fix it for the dvd. Put a hat on him, just do something.

    • Right!
      Great product placements…Canon…Volvo…Volvo…Canon…???
      100% agree Jasper’s AND Rosalie’s wig!
      And Dr. Carlisle looked liked a 40sthg….Gahh

      • Don’t forget about the perfectly perched Burger King bag on the trash can outside of the movie theater.

        • I wondered if anyone else saw that BK bag. THat was so blatant.

          • Sure-it made me want to run out and eat a Whopper or 4. Oh wait, that wasn’t me. BK is disgusting. It’s only redeeming quality is Cinna-Minis. That is all.

    • YES! I cracked up when I saw the Virgin plane. So spot on. Stephenie prolly got a hard-on for that.

    • I think Taylor was freezing his jorts off in that rain scene. He had to say his lines with chattering teeth.

      Poor kid had to film most of film naked – in the WINTER! Thanks Taylor…your sacrifice was much appreciated.

      • I would sacrify myself doing that scene for much less than a million dollars…lol..no critic on Taylor, he is a kid, a very nice kid…I like him a lot!
        In that scene my eye was on all the waterdrops on his shoulder….creepy but true…lol

        • Perv! :-)

          Just kidding, you know I love you! I will mail you later, I just got back from shopping! It’s very Forks-like here in Louisville today!

          • Forks= Louisville..:-)…I sent you 5(!) mails, I am crazy today..lol

          • I know! Thank you, you just love me so much to send me so many emails! Now when am I gonna get an email from Rob?

      • Hahah I noticed he was shivering. Poor boy!

  10. Well put, DtD

  11. Thank you for the entertainment ladies!

    Non-medical professional, you need to figure out a way to get that published in true-medical professional journal. This way I can show the legitimacy of my Robsession to my hubby, who finds great joy in reminding me that I was 13 years-old when Rob was born. Like that is supposed to make me feel bad. . .

    Bianca – I WANT that magnet. I would display it proudly on my fridge. I can adopt you. My daughter would love to have an older sister.

    Kaymac – why does every Turkey day involve, said “intoxicated uncle?” I had one growing up and I would’ve loved to use such a great come back to the constant questioning about having a boyfriend or not. . .

    Notunderthemooneffect – Sorry, hopefully Eclipse will work in your favor.

  12. I love mailbag day! These were really funny.

    And Kaymac…you got to screw with the drunks. We love it!!

  13. Rob is aging kind of fast and it’s really scary. I’m older than him and I look so much younger. Last yr in Twilight he literally looked like he was in high school. Well this year, he looks so much older. I’m not talking in the movies, but in general appearance. I’m sure the drinking and the junk food has something to do with it. Rob, darn it please eat something else? What do you want? Would you like me to make you meals and overnight it to you? Because you know, all you need is to ask and I would totally do it for you….anything you want, I’ll do it.

    Dear Kaymac,

    I loved your little, your fantasy is so much like mine! You made me smile!

    • Oh dear, Kaymac I meant I loved your little letter…sorry girlies, I haven’t had breakfast yet, my mind is hungry.

    • All this giving him eating…
      can I send you over my man?
      You know, I am a lazy cooky and b/c of that he is really SKINNY too!
      Noooo?…ahhh….your little selfish service is only open for HHH? Damn!

      • Robgirl sorry honey, my cooking expertise is for Rob only (and DH)! :-)

        Wait, I saw your man, he’s not skinny, he looks healthy. Maybe we should swap husbands. Mine eats a lot and he’s not fat but he ain’t skinny either!!! I swear food is just going thru the craps in this house. Between him, my sister, nephew, daughter…all I do is cook! My house seems to have become their pit stop. Oh and did I mention my brother is here too for a week?

        • He.has.lost.so.much.weight.after.seeing.Rob’s.”abs”:-)
          For couples ( I mean the male part of it) New Moon has some trouble qualities…hahaha!

          • What? I don’t get it! On Rob? Please explain it to me, email me. I sent you an epic of an email at 1:30 this morning!

          • Was he jealous? LOL. My hubby was jealous, he actually cringed when he saw a scene of Rob stripping off his blue shirt!

        • I feel your pain. I live at the grocery store. And you know that we should be doing something so much more productive than feeding out families, like , I don’t know, searching the internet for more Robporn and posting comments on LTR. :) I think our families can just eat more cereal for dinner!!

          • Hahaha…I am even worse…I pretend that he cooks for me while spending my time on Robstuff…lol…I guess…I would hate to make couple with myself…I am TERRIBLE!

          • Hey yeah I know. I live at the grocery store too! I’ve done the cereal for dinner several times! Haha, bad mommy. When I was so engrossed in Twilight, my family barely saw me. I became a hermit and we had takeout quite a bit! The laundry was forgotten and my DH finally put his foot down and said “enough!”

            BTW when I’m at the grocery store I always stop to look at the pics of Rob on the trashy magazines!

            Some days I would rather be looking at pics of Rob or reading fanfiction! My robporn could use some more pictures!

    • Its the first time I ever sent Moon/UC/Rob an email!
      I was SOOOOOOOOO excited that they posted it. I literally started squeeling.
      I’m glad you liked it : ) why is messing with drunk people so much fun? hahaha

  14. Oh Kaymac, let me assure you that you are completely Normal. That was an awesome letter.

    Bianca’d dad should get a Jacob magnet for the ladies in the house, too!

    Non-medical professional, you have a theory there I could definitely get behind! (thatswhatshesaid)

    • Its good to get reassurance about that. I was realllly doubting my sanity

      • Never doubt, just come to LTR!

  15. “I’M NOT HAVING THIS MAN ON MY REFRIGERATOR!”

    Ok, then what about up against the refridgerator? ;-)

    “I am confident that even you would give our relationship your Ashton-Demi stamp of approval now that you know this clear distinction.”

    That needs to be put on a t-shirt!

    • By: Jena on December 2, 2009
      “I’M NOT HAVING THIS MAN ON MY REFRIGERATOR!”

      Ok, then what about up against the refridgerator?

      Jena you took the words right out of my mouth!

      P.s. I can’t wait to read How My Mother Became Aware of your Hardness” (Part 2)

      • *aherm, I meant Hotness

      • I am so hoping this other version of the letter is in work and progress. PLeease!

    • Cooooollll….Hardness…Hotness…whatever…
      I want a shirt with that refrigerator quote!…
      plus some fine Rob pic! Perhaps the one of today…lol

  16. I tell people all the time that Rob is my boyfriend (sometimes, when I’m blessed enough to have a shot or three of tequila, I’ll use the term “lovah”). I show them a picture on my phone. Some people catch me in my lie, some don’t. I don’t care. Even though I’m 33, no one has said, even once, that he was too young for me, or too hot. This, I love.

    • OMG…my avatar+your pic= great couple…I am soooo jealous!
      Your idea=supergood idea= I will prove it too!

    • I showed my uncle a pic on my phone too! He thought rob was too attractive and “all the ladies in LA would be all over him”

  17. Dear Bianca,

    Where can get one of these magnets? I love your mom and her denial. Someday she will come out of the Rob closet and you will have a partner in your Robsession. You are so lucky!

    Love,
    house

    • Yes, where does one get said magnet.
      I think it would be a perfect christmas gift for my
      mom.
      Love her heart, she is a snowbird. Goes to florida for the
      winter. The other day, I received Rob porn from her in the
      mail, in the form of teeny bopper mags.
      I am 33. She thinks this is the same as my NKOTB obsession,
      so she is trying so hard.
      She deserves a magnet.

      I heart you, MOM

  18. I hate the fact that on guys wrinkles actually look kinda sexy and add character, but on us woman it just generally makes us look old. I definitely got gender-f*cked at birth.

    • LMAO! You’re so funny…that’s true though, so not fair! So on men it’s classic right and on women, it makes us look ancient!

  19. LURVE that first letter, if Rob is now 37 I’m no longer a {dirty old woman} cougar RWAR!!!
    OK Rob ….now we are in an acceptable age bracket can I be first {instead of 5th} in line at The Dumpster?

  20. I know this isn’t post-related, but I thought you all might enjoy this little treat I found this morning:http://www.howstuffworks.com/angel-or-edward-cullen-quiz.htm

  21. I can’t forget the GQ article from earlier this year about Rob drinking 19 cups of coffee (enough to make a rhino’s head explode…or something like that), and the fact that Rob couldn’t remember the last time he ate, but he still has it together enough to end the interview by saying “I f**ked Joe Jonas.” Love him…

    Rob, please come over for dinner. I’m an expert at southern cooking.

    When my friend asked how I was doing since my husband travels a lot, I had to say, “It’s going fine, I have a boyfriend.” You know the rest…

    • OMG you and should hang out! LOL. My DH is gone a lot too! And I’m southern!

      • Southernbelle,

        Please remind me again where you live. I’m in Boulder, CO but grew up in New Orleans.

        I’d love to hang out with you. I’m so longing for a friend who can share all things Rob with me…and will really get what I’m going through.

        • Kmountainlion – I live in Louisville, KY :-). Maybe we can meet in the middle! Right now we’re not even in the same time zone.

          I could always use more twi-friends! :-) Maybe more Robfriends too more than anything! Because frankly my husband is sick of hearing of Robert this Robert that!

          • Hey I am in AZ! Is that in the middle? We could all hang out at my house and then go try and find Stephanie Meyer! I really do think I could convince her to finish Midnight Sun!;)

            @kmountainlion, I am in the same boat! I keep trying to find real life twifriends, but everyone keeps giving me strange looks! And I love Boulder. We used to live in Monument, CO.

          • Southernbell~

            My DH is really trying to understand this, but has limits. He asked me the other night if I wanted to watch “How to Be,” which I thought was super sweet. I’m so glad to be your twi/Rob-friend.

            3hboyshouse~

            Sorry to hear that you are getting strange looks from your “real life” friends. I’ve stopped talking about it, which makes me appreciate you guys so much. We’ll meet you in AZ (not quite in the middle, but I’ll need a snow break soon) and pay a visit to SM re: Midnight Sun. I’m sure she’ll be happy to see us.

          • Hey girls, I can smell a roadtrip coming! :-) I wish I can all meet you in real life, that will be so much fun! You know my friends and family give me strange looks too. I try not to talk too much about twilight and Rob anymore to them.

  22. LMAO!
    Cooking, feeding, phone pics here,lovely conversations there….GIRLS ALL over the GLOBUS are the SAME…every excuse is working….we say things, we mean other things…

    So Rob, move over to Germany, and with Germany I mean MY place, I will show you my guitar collection….no s*x….I like your character….
    I swear….
    lol

  23. Robgirl,
    Is it necessary to spell sex…”s*x.”
    Thanks for making me laugh every day.

    • hahahahahha…Its a very long hahahaha…

      But you know……you are all (the most of you I guess) in this american * cage
      ( sorry for “cage”, but I mean the f*cking thing of don’t saying fu*king…you know what I mean?)…I really don’t know if I could type “sex”, “f*ck”, “drugs” and “Rockn’roll”….it’s difficult to understand for a german girl, we say it here all around the whole day, but….
      my man is an english teacher, so he told me “Don’t be rude, they hate it”, so I don’t want to be rude, I am an educated girl…
      It is REALLY difficult to understand….trust me…..
      I mean…LTR …it’s such a funny place…and than I am afraid that …alll the ladies are laughing while I would be the only one that 1) doesn’t speak english…2) doesn’t put in the right *…and 3) …of doing always the wrong word choices…
      EXAMPLE?
      2 min. ago I spoke with my former italian husband (!) and put in some english words and he said (in italian)…” I think, you’re brain is already gone!”
      So everyday I have to handle 3 (!) languages….and it’s difficult…..BUT it’s all for ROB…!
      Thank you, I am feeling better now ! lol

    • HAHA, I know Robgirl, you’re not offending anyone! I did copy you though and starting adding that asterisk in the middle of the S_X.

  24. Robgirl, your English is amazing. It’s not easy to be funny and witty everyday in a 2nd language yet you do it all the time.

    When you meet Rob he’s going to love your bi-lingualness (that’s what she said) very much.

    • That’s the most lovely thing about my english I ever heard!
      Danke schön,
      Grazie mille,
      Thank you,
      Tesekkür ederim (turkish…I forgot my 4th language…lol) <3

      • You are so welcome, Robgirl86. <3

      • I think your English is just perfect. Ich liebe Robgirl! :-)

  25. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jenny Jerkface, TSOT. TSOT said: Rob's Got Mail: http://wp.me/pogY8-1M3 (via @letter2twilight) [...]

  26. Bianca,
    your convo sounds exactly like my mom and I would have.
    except my mom would say, “he’s sexy as hell, and i need to hit that.”
    (PS. she said that).

  27. Sadly, my mother is still in denial. I’ve tried to explain to her how impossible it is to resist his hotness, and that she shouldn’t feel guilty about it, but she just won’t admit it.

    And yes, my father definitely deserves his own refrigerator magnet!

  28. [...] Rob’s mailbag: overflowing with love and stuff Dear Rob, We’re really behind on emails. Like really really behind. You should probably spank me Uh, anyway, I [...] [...]

  29. [...] my family thinks of Robert Pattinson Today we share part 2 of the “How my mother became aware of Rob’s hottness” fan letter! I kinda miss the short [...]


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