Dear Rob-
I’m beginning to think you might secretly live at my house and I just don’t know it. How’d I come to this conclusion? Well, this morning, late as always these days, I was flipping through my denim pile looking for the something to wear that wasn’t completely lame. I found these pair I hadn’t wore in at least a few years, threw them on, went to zip them up and look what I was greeted with…
A button fly!! How did your pants get into my closet without me knowing?! Wasn’t it just the other day I was talking about not having owned a pair of these in like a decade? Well, there can be no other explanation besides that you planted them there, in my denim pile, so when I wear these jeans and button the fly I think of you. Yeah, that must be it.
So off I went with you in my pants (that’s what she said). Later I came home exhausted, hot and parched so I ran to the fridge in need of some cool refreshment I opened the door and this welcomed me…
A 6pack of Heineken! Now I KNOW this isn’t from any of the girls I live with- we’re more into your import mexican beers, your champagne of beers, or just your straight up champagne. So I know it has to be from a visitor or a secret houseguest.
(please love the High Life!)
Weirded out I knew it was time for some sustenance so I hit up the freezer for a lean cuisine or if I felt especially ambitious some pot stickers… but what do I find?
Seriously?? Some Hot Pockets? So now I’m freaked out and I slowly turn around and ask into the empty house: “Rob? Is that you?? Are you here?”
Freaking out I’m losing my mind I hit up the liquor cabinet… nothing a good cocktail couldn’t cure…
A handle of Stoli?! You might as well have just thrown your Stoli shirt in there along with the sewing kit you used to sew it up. You’ve been here, I know it!! Stop hiding!
Euphoric from looking at the booze and seeing a hot pocket, I raced up the stairs positive you were within reach and leaving me a little rabbit trail of clues to find you. I skid into my room and what’s on the record player?
Yup, Van Morrison and Laura Marling… but alas NO YOU!
So where are you hiding Rob? Why are you leaving me all these clues but no you?! I can only come to a couple conclusions: you’ve sent these ahead since you’re stuck in NYC but will be back in California this week… OR… I’ve completely lost my mind and have taken UC’s post to heart because everywhere I look things remind me of you!
Come out, come out wherever you are!
Themoonisdown
Love Twilight? Or just looking for other stuff with Rob in it? Head on over to Letters to Twilight!
Special Note: Are you going to Comic Con? So am I! I would love to meet/see some of you while I’m there so head on over to the meet up section of the Forum and let me know yours plans! So far I’m planning to get a drink after the panel and recoup from the event! Come play! Not gonna be there? Follow me as I live Tweet the event and post to LTT!
Letters to Rob 
LOL! ” handle of Stoli?! You might as well have just thrown your Stoli shirt in there along with the sewing kit you used to sew it up. You’ve been here, I know it!! Stop hiding!”
Priceless! crying my eyelashes off again.
This was a great post!
By: Natasha on July 21, 2009
at 8:32 am
the shirt should have been wrapped lovingly around the vodka
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 1:41 pm
It’s a sign! Maybe he is going to coming to your house and asked his assitant to get it ready for him. Did you find any boxer briefs? I would have lost my shit at that point.
p.s. – High Life = you WIN!!!
By: Katie S on July 21, 2009
at 8:38 am
My first “first” EVER = I WIN!
By: Katie S on July 21, 2009
at 8:38 am
i feel sad when ppl think they’re first but actually the ‘first’ is just a pending comment. so i gave you a thumbs up!
By: unintendedchoice on July 21, 2009
at 9:45 am
Hahah! Thanks, UC. 😉
By: Katie S on July 21, 2009
at 9:50 am
it is a sign! i need to go back through my laundry or look under my bed, im sure theres a pair of boxer briefs under there somewhere!
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 1:45 pm
Yup, reminders Rob can be found everywhere. I see a Volvo, I think of Rob(well Edward, then I think of Rob),I see an Audi, I think of Rob, I see a tall, thin guy, I think of Rob, I see a guy with messy hair, I think of Rob, I hear a British accent, I think of Rob…
I went to the RM set yesterday because I had an actual legitimate reason to be in NY and they were filming right near Grand Central-alas, after waiting two hours (with my husband pretending to be my gay best friend) they told us that Rob had gone out the other side of the building:(.
However, I did see Pierce Brosnan, who gave a big smile and said hello,and Rob’s plaid shirt going by on the arm of the makeup woman.
One of the crew has hair just like Rob (but he’s about six inches shorter) and every time his hair came into view people would gasp, then see it wasn’t Rob. He has a hair double.
Oh well. It was still kinda cool to just to be there.
By: dazzledtodeath on July 21, 2009
at 8:39 am
‘my husband pretending to be my gay best friend’ LMAO
By: Holly on July 21, 2009
at 8:48 am
awesome! wish you had seen him though. NEXT TIME!
By: unintendedchoice on July 21, 2009
at 9:46 am
HAHAHAHAH gay best friend! WIN!
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 1:48 pm
Ha HA.. HAIR DOUBLE??!!! LMAO… good one!!, yeah, that would be a fine diversion (are you listening robbie, get a hair double bro).
Pierce seems like a pretty cool guy.
Lean pockets (yeah, in my frig too). freaking weird that is.
fyi – I thought they had finished filming in NYC? as of last friday? I guess, not? too many fan girls holding up production?
Anyone know when filming ends and robbies outta NYC?
-x H
By: Hermes on July 21, 2009
at 3:01 pm
More importantly, were the trousers the correct length and any sign of his knickers?
By: Cazza on July 21, 2009
at 8:47 am
Rob would be confused if you called his underwear ‘knickers’….
Girls wear knickers….. boys wear pants and what you call ‘pants’ are trousers/jeans……..just in case you ever need to have that convo with Rob I thought I’d give you the heads up…….{yep I know ‘heads up’ ‘pants’ and ‘Rob’ all in one sentance..I’m happy}
By: Rubytuesday on July 21, 2009
at 9:36 am
I’m British…knickers covered all underwear in our house! Just ask my Mummy……
By: Cazza on July 21, 2009
at 10:44 am
Boys underpants have so many names though, don’t they?
Trollies, wagons, pants, knickers, drawers, undercrackers, briefs, boxers, budgie smugglers…….the list is endless…….
🙂
I LOVE discussing male undewear 🙂
By: summergirl on July 21, 2009
at 12:03 pm
Dying to hear USA colloquialisms for boys underpants too 🙂
That’s normal 🙂
By: summergirl on July 21, 2009
at 12:04 pm
trollies?! undercrackersa?! i love that!!
US male underpants colloquialisms: underwear, jockeys, shorts, BVD’s, underpants, tighty whiteys, boxers… um anymore anyone?
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:10 pm
What’s a BVD?
By: southernbelle on July 21, 2009
at 3:20 pm
It appears that you are indeed my people Moon…well at least somewhat. I have lots of Beer and Vodka at my house too, although my Pockets aren’t usually Lean.
By: ItsLauraHoney on July 21, 2009
at 8:50 am
High Life in a 16oz can?!?!?!
The champagne of beers is my favorite (and yes I am older than 18 and actually graduated from college a few years ago)
By: MelP on July 21, 2009
at 8:58 am
ME TOO!
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:10 pm
These are all good signs that he will be coming home with you from Comic Con!
btw, I am SO STOKED you are going!!! SQUEE!!
By: Jena on July 21, 2009
at 9:22 am
i know jena! this means something right?! he KNOWS!
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:11 pm
I’m so jealous! We don’t have anything that you mentioned in our house at all! First of all I haven’t had a button-fly pair of jeans since high school. My DH only drinks dark beer, Guiness is a staple in his diet. And we don’t have Hot pockets but thanks for the idea. Although my DD and I can’t have it bec. we’re gluten-free, my DH might enjoy it! Who knows maybe Rob will chance this way someday and then he’ll have something to eat!
As far as the music, we don’t have that either 😦 Yes I think he has visited your house without you knowing! Haha.
By: southernbelle on July 21, 2009
at 9:25 am
BTW your freezer is so clean and organized!!!
By: southernbelle on July 21, 2009
at 9:26 am
hahaha we just recently threw a lot of shiz out. three girls and that stuff starts to pile up!
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:12 pm
Did u clean it out for the pictures? 🙂 Girl, you should see my freezer, there’s stuff there that are frozen solid that you can’t even tell what it is.
By: southernbelle on July 21, 2009
at 3:23 pm
You have a turntable?
I think that is the most amazing thing. I want one. I have the Thriller album and Peter Frampton LIVE that I would love to hear on vinyl again. Along with a 45 of Oh Mickey.
All while drinking High Life…it’s ALMOST as good as PBR.
If Rob was stalking you, would you get a restraining order?
By: sassysmart on July 21, 2009
at 9:34 am
If Rob was stalking you, would you get a restraining order?
If Rob was stalking me I’d open the door let him in and it wouldn’t be called stalking it’d be called loving……{yes I was going put f****** but the lady in me wouldn’t allow it}
By: Rubytuesday on July 21, 2009
at 9:40 am
……{yes I was going put f****** but the lady in me wouldn’t allow it}
But the Rob reading this would love it. And you KNOW he reads LTR.
By: Katie S on July 21, 2009
at 9:44 am
I think he does, too. Anyone else?
By: Holly on July 21, 2009
at 9:49 am
He absolutely does. He has to support his lady (moon)…if not, he gets no loving.
By: sassysmart on July 21, 2009
at 10:14 am
No I won’t get restraining order. I would jump on him like how Kristen Stewart jumped on him in the Vanity Fair shoot. I’m skinny and shorter so I’m sure he’ll be able to catch me without staggering! Haha.
By: southernbelle on July 21, 2009
at 6:31 pm
dude you NEED a turntable, everyone does! and dude frampton comes alive?! GOLD!
like ruby said i’d fling the door open and jump on him! so much for a restraining order
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:14 pm
SAssysmart–sorry got it backwards: you want to hear vinyl, not convert it–i’m going the other way with a vinyl converter & a whizzy program called Audacity–i’ve started tranferring my favorites to MP3–should take to the next milennium
By: expat on July 21, 2009
at 2:38 pm
As I sit here, looking at my Laura Marling vinyl, and Van Live at the Hollywood Bowl vinyl, I have a longing to buy you a Pacifico…Dos Equis…Tecate…Corona…anything other than The Champagne of Beers. ‘Cause no, I can’t love the High Life. It’s just not good.
But I do love you.
And your Lucky jeans.
And records. (Especially Sandi Patti’s Finest Moments.)
Rob loves you, too.
By: Leigh Anne on July 21, 2009
at 9:47 am
lets drink a pacifico and listen to some sandi in button fly jeans
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:15 pm
I hope dearest Rob hasn’t swithched over to the Lean Pocket! He doesn’t need to be watching his figure! But all else, he’s been there. Fo’ sho.
By: superhumanmoron on July 21, 2009
at 9:54 am
jajajajaj I went to buy some beer yesterday… just to have a god monday night and when I was in the grocery store instead of picking my usual national beer…
I pick a 6 pack of Heineken!!!
When I get home my friend said:
“since when you drink that kind of beer?”
and I was like… should I say: “its robs favorite beer?”
So I just said: “I prefer this one now..”.
jijiji true story!!! I think I even drunk tweet it!!!
Oh Rob… why do you keep messing with every single neurone that we have… like I once said… you are the hypothalamus of my crazy brain…
By: Libby on July 21, 2009
at 9:59 am
Dear Rob:
Can you come over to my house after Moon’s???
Love,
Libby
jejejejejejej
By: Libby on July 21, 2009
at 10:04 am
Haha, come over my house too! You’ll love Louisville, KY!
OMG I saw this pic of Rob in NYC and his jaw is driving me insane! Anyone else feel this way? Omg, I hope I’m normal!
By: southernbelle on July 21, 2009
at 11:26 am
I’ll be in Louisville on Sunday – can we share – just sent him straight over to my hotel when you’re done.
By: Holly on July 21, 2009
at 11:44 am
Holly yeah I’ll send him over when I’m through with him! I’m assuming you’d be off Hurstbourne Parkway. Will you be here on business or pleasure? 🙂
By: southernbelle on July 21, 2009
at 3:04 pm
totally normal!!
By: Libby on July 21, 2009
at 12:03 pm
Well… after reading through the posts not just today’s either I’ve noticed a recurring theme {no ladies not Rob and sex we are here that’s a given}.
what you ask?
Everyone is now drinking Heinekin….
I believe Rob should get some sort of endorsement fee, surely Heinekin have noticed the increased sales? We should let them know why we have changed our drinking habits and wtf is Nick the pr*** doing?
Isn’t this his area of management? If I a *cough, cough* cougar home-maker has noticed why hasn’t he?
*tongue in cheek* girls in case you didn’t realise, at the moment for sure I can’t for the life of me see Rob endorsing anything…..he’s enough with all the Twilight stuff…..
By: Rubytuesday on July 21, 2009
at 10:42 am
Thanks for the laughs… that was brilliant. You needed an Audi or Volvo in the garage and some glitter on the sidewalk or something.
Oh, I wish I had a Rob of Ones Own!
By: JennB33 on July 21, 2009
at 10:52 am
I love that you have a record player and Laura Marling and Van Morrison on vinyl. You, Moon (I know your real name, but I won’t say it here), are my hero. Love love love you!!
M
By: myria101 on July 21, 2009
at 10:55 am
I love Rob, but I don’t see myself drinking Heineken any time soon. Instead, I think I’m just going to do my best to turn him on to some delicious craft brews. Maybe next time it’s my turn to plan our date, I’ll take him on a brew tour… some of them give away free mugs and hats, and you KNOW he loves that shiz.
Moon – he must just be prepping your place for when he comes over after ComicCon. Check your bedside table, I bet he left some Trojan Magnums in there for later use.
By: Jax on July 21, 2009
at 11:15 am
*thud*
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:17 pm
whoa.. Trojan Magnums (isnt that like the supersize ones).. …sigh. (yeah, my overies just exploaded envisioning that one too).
By: Hermes on July 21, 2009
at 3:24 pm
Moon! I’m totally jealous that you are going to Comic Con! But I’m glad that your apartment is all set up t be nice and cofortable for Rob when you take him home. He could use some spoiling.
By: JodieO on July 21, 2009
at 11:21 am
some spoiling?? “oh i think we can handle that!”
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:18 pm
OOOOooooohhh!
By: Holly on July 21, 2009
at 2:29 pm
Naaaughty!
By: JodieO on July 21, 2009
at 9:54 pm
Have you all seen these? They were just posted at the forum! There’s like 40 of em!
THUD!
http://www.usmagazine.com/photos/robert-pattinsons-sexiest-photos?slideshow_id=1152&o=0
By: Jena on July 21, 2009
at 12:12 pm
Oh Holy Lord! That wet pic of him where he’s turned to the side and almost has his hand on the junk….oh my. *wipes drool away*
By: Holly on July 21, 2009
at 2:37 pm
Oh my gosh, those are some hot pics of him! I like the ones where he’s wearing a leather jacket….he looks really bad! Thanks for posting!
By: southernbelle on July 21, 2009
at 3:25 pm
Holly! I love you so much right now for pointing me at those photos. Although damn . . .those US Weekly peeps must be out to get me, cause those are just heart-stopping photos.
Do you think if I pass out Rob will give me mouth to mouth to revive me?
By: Jen on July 21, 2009
at 5:59 pm
Holy mother of……….
Can those PANTS GET ANY TIGHTER???!!! And the torn shirt….ooohhh….. HOBOLICIOUS ROB….
This man kills me…..geez.
By: la vie est belle on July 21, 2009
at 5:03 pm
So jealous of you at Comic Con! I wish . . .well, okay, if I only had one wish it wouldn’t be to be at Comic Con to see Rob, it would be Rob at my house to see me. But that’s not the point.
The point is I can’t wait for your updates! Have a wonderful time and keep us all posted with EVERYTHING.
By: Jen on July 21, 2009
at 12:15 pm
What really sucks is that I have to work Thursday (naturally) and Twitter is blocked at work so I won’t get to see any tweeting from Comic Con. 😦 Maybe I’ll play hookie, LOL!
By: Jena on July 21, 2009
at 12:18 pm
Jena,
Go here: http://agentanon.com/browse.php?u=Oi8vdHdpdHRlci5jb20v&b=0
You can thank me later. 🙂
By: DanaB on July 21, 2009
at 3:19 pm
HAHHAHHAHAHA
that is perfect! i found a bottle of Stoli in our liquour cabinet, and helped myself to it as i was studying last night.. all while instead of employment law, i was thinkin of what laws govern drunken dumpster diving ><
i cant see myself drinking Heine tho.. ugh. too skunky for my taste. this boy should come up to canada for some Keith's!
❤ WIN!
By: hunnieb on July 21, 2009
at 12:34 pm
Moon I am glad Rob is planning to visit you. Hopefully it will give him a good break from the screaming teens and craziness of the comic con.
Though I am sure it won’t be too restful…
Sad to say I cannot fit in my button fly jeans any longer…good way to remind me I am getting older.
Only thing Rob could find at my place from your list is the Stoli.
Good post again!
By: BuddhaBar on July 21, 2009
at 1:24 pm
restful… hmmm yea i cant say he won’t hear screaming. it just won’t be from teen girls
By: themoonisdown on July 21, 2009
at 2:59 pm
oh I have those same lucky jeans, the ones with the little clovers down the button fly. All I can think about is his package when I see any sort of buttons on jeans. Anyones jeans. Its pathetic really. and Rob would totally love my house. We have several types of fine beverages I’ve seen him drinking. Lots of soda and processed microwavable foods, TWO microwaves and don’t forget, a piano and I believe that I own about a hundred hoodies. We could share 🙂
Sigh..he can leave me signs anytime.
By: Kristin on July 21, 2009
at 1:33 pm
ahem! moon, you can’t find him because he’s currently with me at the moment but no worries, i’d handle him with care and just enough roughness and he’ll be back in no time. You know what hey say..sharin is carin
By: ♥rob on July 21, 2009
at 2:17 pm
ROB WAS AT YOUR HOUSE AND YOU DIDNT CALL ME!? Im hurt.
although, since you havent found him… I may or may not have already known and left a trail of heinys and in and out burgers to my car…. ;]
I never claim to fight fair. bahahaha
Xk
AND THANK YOU TO WHOEVER FROM LTR VISITED MY NEWEST BLOG: seriouslykortnii.blogspot.com
its a belated thank you, but I had not checked my comments. ever. til today. I am so touched ❤ and glad I gave you goose bumps.
By: Kortnii on July 21, 2009
at 2:49 pm
moon, godspeed–can’t twitter with you, so take lots of fotos–though, of course, i’m interested only in Angel Eyes–
By: expat on July 21, 2009
at 2:53 pm
that was hilarious. omg. i actually do have a pair levi button fly jeans that are cut up into shirts now.
By: twipam on July 21, 2009
at 3:18 pm
MOON.. your really Rob admit it! You love us all and have been playing with our affections.
One of these days you’re gonna come out to us and say.. ladies.. GUESS WHAT..( lol )
I always wondered why I keep craving a Heine and hot pocket for lunchies. Its a Rob thing.
x H.
By: Hermes on July 21, 2009
at 3:21 pm
I have a fridge full of Coke. Rob drinks Coke all the time. Has he been in my house too??
By: jellybeanrainbow on July 21, 2009
at 4:37 pm
Moon, I need to set up hidden cameras in your house. You know, those nanny cams hidden in various places, so we can prove, once and for all, that Rob has been in your house, lounging on your couch and drinking heines. I promise to share my findings.
By: la vie est belle on July 21, 2009
at 5:54 pm
Maybe I come over and just wait for Rob with you? We could take shifts in staking out your house (because a girl’s gotta sleep!), waiting for him to leave you more clues. And trust me, if I find him on my shift, I definitely WILL wake you up immediately and NOT sex him up in ever way imaginable.
*Pfft* Definitely WON’T do that!
By: oopsilovetwi on July 21, 2009
at 8:06 pm
Wide Awake has chapter 50 up: Secretive Sandies
http://angstgoddess003.livejournal.com
By: EyeC on July 22, 2009
at 12:11 am
I love you forever, Ee!
Thank you!
P.S. new RB vid up tomorrow – will post link then. You’ll like it.
By: natalie on July 22, 2009
at 12:22 am
Also new TOV.
By: EyeC on July 22, 2009
at 12:27 am
Best news ever E for both, guess i will be hre till midnight trying to catch up cause I won’t be able to resist reading these!
By: Lizzie on July 22, 2009
at 1:07 am
Hearing you, Lizzie.
How are you?
By: natalie on July 22, 2009
at 1:15 am
Far out.
I’m gonna have to wait until I get home.
That WA link was a bit saucy for work. Damn shame.
Where is Nuggety? Come back. I miss you.
Where is Lizzie? I know you’re busy, Mouldy Toast Goddess, but come visit.
By: natalie on July 22, 2009
at 1:09 am
work just really full on right now, i try and pop in but that’s about as much as i can swing at the moment. Worried about FN she seems to have momentarily disappeared, I hope this means she is working somewhere, or hopefully following the rainbow to find the money tree!
catch you soon
bye for now lovelies
By: Lizzie on July 22, 2009
at 1:26 am
Yes, I’m worried about Nuggety, too.
By: natalie on July 22, 2009
at 1:32 am
I wrote FN today but haven’t heard back. She may be involved with family stuff. Started worrying aout her too.
I think today was EP’s last day of classes.
By: EyeC on July 22, 2009
at 1:33 am
I just went and emailed her.
It’s been a few days now – far longer than she’s ever been away from the boards before. Something doesn’t gel right.
By: natalie on July 22, 2009
at 1:45 am
Love it!
By: Sarah on July 22, 2009
at 1:01 am
hahaha moon, i think he was in your house. Those kinds of things just don’t happen.
And I am super, super jealous you’re going to comic-con. I’m pretty sure Rob is going to be there. Maybe you should ask him if he’s been stopping by* 🙂 I hope you meet him! Or Kristen, and tell her to smile more 😛
*not really.
By: brittany on July 22, 2009
at 12:27 am
Stuff that makes me think of Rob at work:
All those goddamn sleeping bags!!! (I work at a daycare)
Wish girls would now choose a different color, pink is officially Rob’s!!
http://twitpic.com/b6p5g
By: Cyn_TR on July 22, 2009
at 2:30 pm