Happy 4th of July from your favorite Americans UC & Moon! I know this day isn’t a very happy one in British history since our country beat your country’s ass in a war. But I think we can work through it. We can turn it into a little game. I (UC) went to college in the south and some people don’t seem to be over The Civil War yet (I understand- it was recent- mid 1800s..) They called me a Yankee. Wtf? I never even heard the word “Yankee” till I went to college and found out that apparently I am one. (Yankee= from the north… I think… any southerners wanna help me out?)
We had good times in college, pretending with my friends that we gave a damn about a war fought so long ago. We’d be walking to class and I’d pass a friend from Georgia and I’d say, “I’m gonna getcha in Gettysburg.” And then he’d say, “But I’m gonna win in Spotsylvania!” It was a hoot!
So whadayasay? Should we do something similiar to what I did with my southern friends in college? Like, I can call you up and say, “Yo Limey- put on your red coat and get over here to celebrate the US signing the declaration of Independence from your country” And you’d come over, wearing your red coat because you’re such a good sport, and I’d be in my blue coat. And if you bring me some tea I could say, ”Hell no! I don’t want your tea. I’m gonna dump this tea overboard into the waters in Boston.” Imagine all the jokes we could make..
Or we could forego all the history ideas (cuz seriously those 4 things above took me a 1/2 hour to look for on wikipedia) and just celebrate the 4th of July the good ol’ American way- hot dogs, hamburgers, deviled eggs, volley ball, watermelon, throwing up on the volley ball court because you played too soon after eating the hot dogs, hamburgers and deviled eggs, refueling after your purging with more hot dogs, a dip in the pool, playing Born in the USA 100 times and then switching to your mix of Lee Greenwood, Bruce Springstreen & Toby Keith. And capping off the night with an amazing backyard firework display where this phrase is usually heard: ‘Shit… they didn’t go off. Someone go see why. No you go. No you. GET THE FOUR YEAR OLD AWAY. We will never do this again. These are supposed to be foul-proof fireworks! Get Uncle Joe- he’ll check it out” and Uncle Joe does check it out. And then the rest of the night is spent in the ER, with Uncle Joe, who has a black hand and is now completely bald as opposed to half-way bald. Oh and don’t forget to wear a flag somewhere on your body (looks like Moon took care of that for you- cute!)
I’m a cool rocking Daddy in the U.S.A.,
UnintendedChoice & The MoonisDown
For all you US- LTR fans, enjoy your holiday! We are both kinda MIA this weekend so if your comment doesn’t get approved right away, don’t fret- it will be posted eventually! Enjoy your time off! Relax! Jump in a pool! Watch a movie with Rob in it!
I do realize that without winning the Revolutionary War, the Civil War and that war we won to get Alaska, the US would look quite different (whatever would we do without Alaska?). So I’m grateful. So don’t get your panties in a twist thinking I’m disrespectful of your great-great-great-great-great-grandfather who fought in Gettysburg. Cuz I ain’t untwisting them. Cuz that’s just nasty….. xo