Posted by: UC | January 30, 2009

I’m easy. Pick me

"Lay where you're laying, don't make a sound. I know they're watching. They're watching. All the commotion, the kiddie like play has people talking. Talking"

"Lay where you're laying, don't make a sound. I know they're watching. They're watching. All the commotion, the kiddie like play has people talking. Talking"

 Dear Rob,

We’ve heard over and over all about how you love the crazy girls. And, I’ll be honest, I was a little jealous because I don’t consider myself really all that crazy (what? Yeah, I run a blog where I write letters to you. So?) but I’ve come up with a few ways I could become crazier for you, like:

  • Moving to London, “randomly” running into your sister Lizzy, becoming her bff and then convincing her to be my lesbian lover (I’d switch teams to get close to you)
  • Rocking out at every show that your friends Sam Bradley, Marcus Foster, Bobby Long and Jackson Rathbone ever put on, just in case you decide to show. (Yep, I’d even endure the 100Monkeys)
  • Going to Vancouver NOW to wait for your arrival in late March (I’d, ew, go to Canada for you- oh SNAP jk jk Canadian readers! I <3 Canada xo!)
  • Shopping till I drop (or ’til I kill one of them out of utter annoyance at the hand holding and fake lesbo kissing) with Nikki and Kristen. (Yep, I’d even do THAT. I KNOW, I AM committed- and REALLY crazy, obvs.)

but THEN, I had a lucky break. I read this interview you did in Mexico and they asked you this question:

Interviewer: What’s your type of girl?
Robby-pie: I don’t know, my tastes change all the time. I used to love crazy girls who were hard to get. But not anymore. 

This is GREAT news for me! Because we’ve already established I’m not crazy! And BETTER YET I am NOT hard to get! In fact- I’m quite the opposite. I’m extremely, extremely easy.

I dare you to test me, come on… Let’s see how easy I can really be..

<3,
Me (UnintendedChoice) 

Source & a BIG THANK YOU to Sidhe Vicious for finding that thumb pic for all of us me to enjoy!

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Responses

  1. Oh Unintended Choice, you rock my world.

    As for you and Rob, Get it girrrrl, Get it!

  2. That pic is…amazing! Made my day with that one!

    ROFL on how “extremely easy” you are! I, too, am pretty easy, at least when it comes to Rob.

    But, Rob, if your taste changes again, I can PRETEND to be hard to get for you! It’ll be hard, but I’ve got a “can do” attitude. At least that is what my job evaluation says….

  3. You quoted KOL.

    Fantastic Fabulousness.

    Forget Rob. Will you marry me?

  4. “I’d switch teams to get close to you” I almost fell out of my chair. I love this site. You ROCK!!!!

    • @Carrie No, carrie YOU ROCK! b/c you actually read what i write.. which is kinda a miracle:)

  5. Ah. He’s figuring out the Mysteries of Life one beer at a time. Love him and you!

  6. @UC OMG I love this piece!!! My fav was switiching teams…ROFL…”Robbie-pie” is a pretty cute pet name…can you imagine if Rob were to ever stumble upon THIS site??? He would have PLENTY of “crazies” to choose from!!! :)

    • @krazykidd my prayers are torn every night “god please bring rob to my site and have him miraculously fall in love with me and my husband be okay with sharing” as well as “god please never ever ever let rob read the things i say about him” :)

  7. Wow you’r e so dedicated to even switch teams for him, although it may be overwhelming for him to deal with you and his sister “together” Are you not afraid that his heart will be crushed to dust when he finds out?
    Thats ok, I will pick up the peices and nurse him back to health with a case of molson canadian and a carton of reservation smokes :) both readily available to us canadians lol
    Seriously though, thanks for giving me a reason to get up!!!

    • @natasha and thanks for forgiving me for my canadian comment. you have my permission to make fun of me all you want (google things about philadelphians- there is PLENTY to choose from!)

  8. UC, i bet i could be easier than you.

    snap.

  9. @ UC: You killed it with this letter. One of your best yet.

    I also have to say that I am so pleased Rob’s mother never stopped him from sucking his thumb. You know they say practice makes perfect… which kinda makes you wonder… what else can he suck?

  10. I’m a first time commenter but I’ve been reading for a while…
    I kept reading your site late at night while my husband fell asleep in bed.
    He kept getting jealous from all my giggling like a school girl. He kept asking irritated, “what’s so funny?” to which i’d say “nothing nothing, just go back to sleep.”

    He got so tired of being out of the loop that he now reads it along with me.

    Thanks for being our nightly ritual!

    • @Maliamo yay! I’m glad you commented. we know we have readers that don’t comment, and it’s fun to find out who they are (and read YOUR blog!) we have a MALE READER!? whoo hoo!

  11. oh you crack me up!! especially how you let everyone know how easy you are :D

    love your blog!!

    • @stephdc THANKS for commenting! glad to make you laugh!

  12. @UC- Wow… You’re amazing for quoting Kings of Leon (I <3 them) and you’re amazing for your total commitment to Robbie-pie. I would do a lot of "crazy" things for him, however I don’t think I could go gay for his sister. I’m glad he’s not digging the hard to get thing anymore because we all must be pretty easy to get if we spend our days and nights confessing our undying lust/affection for a man we’ve never met.
    anyways… thanks for making me laugh… yet again.

    • @justgotwicked- glad you caught the quote! obviously the song is QUITE appropriate for the picture :):)

  13. @ UC Once again, freaking hysterical.. you should do stand up. Change teams… oh hell yeah!! Your dedication is speaks for us all.. well at least me. And if he is as dirty a boy as I bet he is, then I’m sure he’d love watching and/or partaking in your switch, which would only bring him that much closer. Mission accomplished!

    btw, he is definately thinking naughty thoughts in that picture. ahhhh.. my day is complete.

    • @suzieQ i LOVE LOVE that you told me i should do stand up. i immediately called my husband and said “see, someone thinks i’m funny” b/c he makes fun of me so often for how NOT funny i usually am! xo!

  14. I couldn’t take my eyes away from the picture long enough to fully read the letter… it’s much too distracting!

  15. @UC- I didn’t know u were in Philly. Im in that smelly armpit state right next to you… the dirty jerz. How do you stand it out here?

    and @suzieQ- I agree about UC doing stand-up. Can you imagine her and Moon together? It would be too much to handle. If they make me cry just reading their jokes I don’t think I could take the real thing.
    Ok… back to daydreaming about the “naked Rob on top”

  16. @UC first, the picture, I don’t think I have seen that one. Thank you very much for that!!
    second, switching sides, you are totally dedicated! I don’t think I could do that, but you never know what you would do to get Rob’s attention, right?
    I would love to know what Rob thinks of this site. I hope he comes across it somehow. That would be too funny.

  17. I loved this letter. You guys crack me up.

  18. Officially coming out of lurkdom to say the quote under his pic made my day.

    Love this blog,

    Nat

    • @nataliae you know you think of Rob EVERYTIME you hear that song! thanks for coming out of lurkdom to say hi :)

  19. @UC- another piece of brilliance! Thx for making me laugh yet again!

  20. OK, I’m actually kinda sorta just a little bit embarrassed to say this, but I’ve constantly once even considered point 2.

    Yeah… I’m a weirdo. You don’t have to talk to me again if you don’t want to.

  21. PS: that “constantly” should have had appeared with a strikethrough put on! Is it just because you can’t use strikethroughs on comments or have you actually put a lie-detection-software to this thing?

  22. @wicked- dear god us doing twilight stand up?! we’d totally get boo-ed off the stage, or maybe asked to perform at a twilight convention cause those are the only people who could understand our brand of crazy.

    @stephdc- WELCOME!!

    UC- you had me at sex on fire lyrics. PS im listening to it now :D

  23. @Maliamo my husband does the same thing. He’ll say are you reading that crazy letters site again. You women are sick. ha ha ha

    @UC I too especially loved the “switch teams” and “extreamly easy” comment. I think with enough booze and illegal drugs we’d all switch teams for Rob. In fact, I think most of us would do just about anything for a few hours alone with him. Poor man would never be the same

  24. Okay, group make-out session at UC’s house…who’s in?

    Make sure you get that video camera fixed…

  25. @Sass- I’m in, just calling the airport for a flight to Philly. Ahem- to Mr.F and Kids – mommy will be back before you know it-

  26. Do you have any idea how many men would kill to be in Rob’s shoes. We have a bunch of awesome women willing to have a make-out session in order to get his attention. I sooo hope he stumbles upon this site someday.

  27. at work.. so all I have time to say is LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

    and, I’m in for anything that would get his attention :)

  28. Great letter UC! Loved the switching teams bit. It’s a great idea! I mean…it’s a really funny idea that I would never seriously consider. Mostly.

  29. Hey Rob, if things don’t work out with Moon and UC, I just wanted to let you now I’m a sure thing. Every moment from now until we meet is foreplay between you and I. I’m hiding; come find me. I’m older than you. I’m crazy, but mostly in a fun, you-don’t-need-a-restraining-order kind of way. I’ll make you feel like the god you are.

    This picture of you…I’ll just get started now, shall I?

  30. Your blog JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER!!!!! And now you quote my current fave song – Kings of Leon?! I’m dying over here! I love you guys. Truly.

  31. Can I just say that I’m wishing that I am his thumb here (& much much more)!

  32. @Christa…”I’ll make you feel like the god you are.”

    LMAO!! Loved your little mini-letter, hee!!

  33. OMG, when I saw that caption, I was like’ “They have read my mind, yet again!” That song has always reminded me of him!! Love the picture too, btw :)

  34. LOL!! Oh, this was so perfect… but would you switch teams to be with the pseudo-lesbians KS and NR just to be close to him? It may be a better plan. You can lure him in with a foursome. Just sayin’.

  35. Darnit! I miss all the fun when I have to work! That letter was hilarious…and the pic…ahhh! Love the use of the song lyrics. My husband put this on the other day and I didn’t have the heart to tell him the only reason I put it on his ipod was b/c Rpattz likes them.

  36. Wow UC – you easy, easy girl. You are a freaking GENIUS! Going lesbo for Lizzy just to be closer to Rob. This girl….is a genius. I can picture you right now, at the family dinner table – helping yourself to some Robby-pie under the table. I don’t think he’d tell either. He’s a bad, bad boy.

    Oh, and that picture – I can’t tell you what it does to me. damn

  37. Wait a second – Rob has said that he likes Kings of Leon? This is all too much for me! As if I didn’t love the song already, now it’s going to remind me of Rob…I’ll never be sane again.

  38. @Christa this-“Every moment from now until we meet is foreplay between you and I. I’m hiding; come find me. I’m older than you. I’m crazy, but mostly in a fun, you-don’t-need-a-restraining-order kind of way. I’ll make you feel like the god you are.” is cracking me up!!

    Yesterday as I was reading and my husband was asking what I was doing I went ahead and told him about this site. He was all there are crazier women than you? I was like oh yeah, so you all make me look great!!lol

  39. UC – I don’t know what’s funnier – your letters to rob or your comments:
    “god please never ever ever let rob read the things i say about him”

  40. Wow..LAdies…Just Wow…
    @UC, I’d totes switch teams, and I too hope and pray that Rob does/doesn’t find this site, and read all the loving/psycho things I’m thinking about him :)
    @Spank
    what else indeed?? I have some things in mind!! :P
    @Christa
    What a lure…”I’m crazy, but mostly in a fun, you-don’t-need-a-restraining-order kind of way. I’ll make you feel like the god you are.”…You’ll catch him with that for sure!!

  41. @UC
    My prayers too are torn each night

    1st Please, Please let Rob show up in San Jose to promote How to Be, and stay in the same hotel, and drink in the same bar, and sit right behind me…

    2nd Please Lord, If I ever to run into Rob when I am with my husband plese let Megan Fox be with Rob so it distracts my husband!

  42. Your site and ROb’s lovely face has made my bronchitis worth living through. New daily read.

    • @susan yay! we hope your bronchitis clears up soon though! welcome!

  43. Ah, I miss SO MUCH when I don’t come on here for a whole day!!!

    @UC- absolutely LOVED the letter!! And that picture…. w-o-w!!! yum-my! :)

    @Sass- I’m so in for that session! Ha! Whatever gets Rob to us FASTER! I’m sure he would loooove to join in on that action! I mean, can you imagine, what would that boy do with ALL of us there at once… whoever side it was right, he’d never be the same again! And obviously he would never, ever want to leave us!

    So…in a way I DEFINITELY hope he finds this site someday… you know he’s not gonna think we’re a crazy bunch of lunatics… he’s gonna think, “how do I get to them all at once?!” Rob, hunnie, just tell us where and when, dear, and you KNOW we’ll be there!

  44. Damn! I feel so much better knowing I am not the only one that listens to that KOL song and thinks about Robbie!

  45. Cute post.
    You know I just ran across photos of Orlando Bloom shirtless none-the-less on set of a new movie he is in. He is delicious and of appropriate age to drool over for me right now.

    But I still like Robert Pattinson.

    Oh gawd those two are hard to decide on. Yum!

  46. I’m sorry, what did you say? Got a little distracted at the picture of him with his finger in his mouth. Rawr.

  47. Uh-oh ladies, I found Edward:

    Don’t worry, he had a smile on his face! Just like Rob will when he meets us!

  48. @vickyb- haha thats great! and duh he had a smile.. who wouldnt after reading our awesome entries?! Rob will probably faint when he realizes he has SO MANY women with the same dirty thoughts he does! :)

  49. Have you ladies seen this??

  50. @Mrs. P What? The link is not working…


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